Thus was I dismissed, and thus I sought my home. Alas! what would they think of me? unable, after all my boasting, to keep my place, even for a single year, as governess to three small children, whose mother was asserted by my own aunt to be a ‘very nice woman.’ Having been thus weighed in the balance and found wanting, I need not hope they would be willing to try me again. And this was an unwelcome thought; for vexed, harassed, disappointed as I had been, and greatly as I had learned to love and value my home, I was not yet weary of adventure, nor willing to relax my efforts. I knew that all parents were not like Mr. and Mrs. Bloomfield, and I was certain all children were not like theirs. The next family must be different, and any change must be for the better. I had been seasoned by adversity, and tutored by experience, and I longed to redeem my lost honour in the eyes of those whose opinion was more than that of all the world to me.
Chapter VI
The Parsonage Again
For a few months I remained peaceably at home, in the quiet enjoyment of liberty and rest, and genuine friendship, from all of which I had fasted so long; and in the earnest prosecution of my studies, to recover what I had lost during my stay at Wellwood House, and to lay in new stores for future use. My father’s health was still very infirm, but not materially worse than when I last saw him; and I was glad I had it in my power to cheer him by my return, and to amuse him with singing his favourite songs.
No one triumphed over my failure, or said I had better have taken his or her advice, and quietly stayed at home. All were glad to have me back again, and lavished more kindness than ever upon me, to make up for the sufferings I had undergone; but not one would touch a shilling of what I had so cheerfully earned and so carefully saved, in the hope of sharing it with them. By dint of pinching here, and scraping there, our debts were already nearly paid. Mary had had good success with her drawings; but our father had insisted upon her
Примечания
1
Whether this be the case with my history – (уст.) Так ли дело обстоит с моей историей
2
of no avail – (разг.) бесполезные
3
saving was not my father’s forte – (разг.) бережливость была не самой сильной стороной батюшки
4
had better keep within bounds – (разг.) проявляли сдержанность (умеренность)
5
were all of the same mind as myself – (разг.) придерживались того же мнения, что и я
6
we could not spare you – (разг.) нам без тебя не обойтись
7
still affected to be gay – (разг.) все равно притворялась веселой
8
the road was at a dead level – (разг.) дорога шла по ровной местности
9
hands are so benumbed with the cold – (разг.) руки так онемели от холода
10
the flower of the flock – (разг.) краса и гордость семьи
11
I shall allow of no excuses – (уст.) никакие отговорки не принимаются
12
by dint of great labour and patience – (уст.) с помощью трудолюбия и терпения
13
that beats everything – (зд.) это уж совсем никуда не годится
14
to that end – (разг.) с этой целью
15
to crush this vicious tendency in the bud – (разг.) пресечь в корне эти порочные наклонности
16
I’m too sharp for you – (разг.) меня не перехитришь
17
entered the schoolroom – (уст.) начала учиться
18
with a cursory glance – (разг.) беглым взглядом
19
put her in a passion – (уст.) выводить ее из терпения
20
and see them made decent – (разг.) и приведите их в порядок
21
there was a mutual dislike – (разг.) существовала взаимная неприязнь
22
to what end I could not imagine – (разг.) понятия не имею, для чего
23
to make a Douglas-larder – (уст.) превратить в помойку
24
seldom deigned to notice me – (уст.) редко снисходил до того, чтобы замечать меня
25
strained every nerve – (уст.) старалась изо всех сил