Kevin still wasnt sure how to reply to that. It was one of those kind things that people said that was kind of useless at the same time. The one thing he needed was the thing they couldnt give him: to undo all of this; for things to be normal again. Teachers knew a lot of things, but not that.
Still, he did his best to pretend to be normal all the way through his math class, and through most of history after that. Ms. Kapinski was telling them about some early European history, which Kevin wasnt sure was actually on any kind of test, but which had apparently been what she majored in at college, and so seemed to show up more than it should.
Did you know that most of the Roman remains found in Northern Europe arent actually Roman? she said. Kevin generally liked Ms. Kapinskis classes, because she wasnt afraid to wander off the point and tell them about whatever fragments of the past entered her head. It was a reminder of just how much there had been in the world before any of them.
So theyre fake? Francis de Longe asked. Ordinarily, Kevin might have been the one asking it, but he was enjoying the chance to be quiet, almost invisible.
Not exactly, Ms. Kapinski said. When I say they arent Roman, I mean that theyre remains left behind by people who had never been near what is now Italy. They were the local populations, but as the Romans advanced, as they conquered, the local people realized that the best way to do well was to fit in with Roman ways. The way they dressed, the buildings they lived in, the language they spoke, they changed everything to make it clear which side they were on, and because it gave them a better chance of good positions in the new order. She smiled. Then, when there were rebellions against Rome, one of the keys to being part of it was not using those symbols.
Kevin tried to imagine that: the same people in a place shifting who they were as the political tide changed, their whole being changing depending on who ruled. He thought it might be a bit like being in one of the popular crowds at school, trying to wear the right clothes and say the right things. Even so, it was hard to imagine, and not just because images of impossible landscapes continued to filter through at the back of his mind.
That was probably the only good thing about what was wrong with him: the symptoms were invisible. It was also the scary thing in a way. There was this thing killing him, and if people didnt know about it already, they would never find out. He could just sit there and no one would ever
Kevin felt the vision coming, rising up through him like a kind of pressure building through his body. There was the rush of dizziness, the feeling of the world swimming away as he connected with something else. He started to stand to ask if he could be excused, but by then, it was already too late. He felt his legs giving way and he collapsed.
He was looking at the same landscapes he remembered from before, the sky the wrong shade, the trees too twisted. He was watching the fire sweep through it, blinding and bright, seeming to come from everywhere at once. Hed seen all of that before. Now, though, there was a new element: a faint pulse that seemed to repeat at regular intervals, precise as a ticking clock.
Some part of Kevin knew a clock was what it had to be, just as he knew by instinct that it was counting down to something, not just marking the time. The pulses had the sense of getting subtly more intense, as if building up to some far-off crescendo. There was a word in a language he shouldnt have understood, but he did understand it.
Wait.
Kevin wanted to ask what he was supposed to be waiting for, or how long, or why. He didnt, though, partly because he wasnt sure who he was supposed to ask, and partly because almost as suddenly as the moment had come, it passed, leaving Kevin rising up from darkness to find himself lying on the floor of the classroom, Ms. Kapinski standing over him.
Just lie still a moment, Kevin, she said. Ive sent for the school medic. Hal will be here in a minute.
Kevin sat up in spite of her instructions, because hed come to know what this felt like by now.
Im fine, he assured her.
I think we should let Hal be the judge of that.
Hal was a big, round former paramedic who served to make sure that the students of St. Brendans School came through whatever medical emergencies they suffered. Sometimes, Kevin suspected that they did it because the thought of the medics idea of care made them ignore the worst of injuries.
I saw things, Kevin managed. There was a planet, and a burning sun, and a kind of message like a countdown.
In the movies, someone would have insisted on contacting somebody important. They would have recognized the message for what it was. There would have been meetings, and investigations. Someone would have done something about it. Outside of the movies, Kevin was just a thirteen-year-old boy, and Ms. Kapinski looked at him with a mixture of pity and mild bewilderment.
Well, Im sure its nothing, she said. Its probably normal to see all kinds of things if youre having this sort of episode.
Around them, Kevin could hear the muttering from the others in his class. None of it made him feel better.
just fell down and started twitching
I heard he was sick, I hope you cant catch it
Kevin thinks he sees planets
The last one was the one that hurt. It made it sound as though he were going crazy. Kevin wasnt going crazy. At least, he didnt think he was.
Despite his best attempts to insist that he was fine, Kevin still had to go with Hal when the medic came. Had to sit in the medics office while he shone lights in Kevins eyes and asked questions about a condition so rare he obviously had no more clue than Kevin did what was going on.
The principal wanted to see us once I was sure you were okay, he said. Do you feel up to walking to his office, or should we ask him to come here?
I can walk, Kevin said. Im fine.
If you say so, Hal said.
They made their way to the principals office, and Kevin almost wasnt surprised to find that his mother was there. Of course they would have called her in for a medical emergency, of course she would be there if he collapsed, but that wasnt good, not when she was supposed to be at work.
Kevin, are you okay? his mother asked as soon as he arrived, turning to him and drawing him into a hug. What happened?
Im fine, Mom, Kevin said.
Ms. McKenzie, Im sure we wouldnt have called you in if it werent serious, the principal said. Kevin collapsed.
Im fine now, Kevin insisted.
It didnt seem to make any difference how many times he said that, though.
Plus, the principal said, it seems that he was pretty confused when he came around. He was talking about well, other planets.
Planets, Kevins mother repeated. Her voice was flat when she said that.
Ms. Kapinski says it disrupted her class quite a bit, the principal said. He sighed. Im wondering if maybe Kevin might be better off staying at home for a while.
He said it without looking at Kevin. There was a decision being made there, and although Kevin was at the heart of it, it was clear he didnt actually get a say.
I dont want to miss school, Kevin said, looking at his mother. Surely she wouldnt want him to either.
I think what we have to ask, the principal said, is if, at this point, school is really the best thing Kevin can be doing with the time he has.