What are you doing? I said.
He sucked for a bit, then stopped, holding the smoke in. Smack, he said.
Id never seen anyone do heroin before.
You seen April? I said, and looked away. The yard was empty but I looked around anyway.
There she is, said Ed. He was pointing back inside through the sliding glass doors. On the far side of the room, April and Barry were standing in the doorway to his bedroom, holding each other. Then their heads were slanted and they were kissing.
I walked to the front of the house. Fred was sitting on the brick step before the front door, smoking a cigarette.
Lets get the fuck out of this place, I said.
He said okay and we walked down the driveway to my car.
Where are we going? said Fred.
Fucking nowhere, I said, and drove faster.
I was at a stop sign at Middlefield, which was a pretty busy road, so I waited for a while. I was still angry. Then I drove forward and I saw the white car sink right into the front side of my car. It hit my car around the front tire, and there were some crashing sounds, and my car spun to the right, and then I was facing down Middlefield. For a moment I just stayed there. It was all very still, more than still. And then I was driving again, fast. In the rearview I saw the white station wagon with its front crumpled waiting in the center of Middlefield, diagonal to the road. Other cars were stopping. I turned off Middlefield onto a side street and my tires screeched and slipped, and when I pulled the car straight I raced down the block.
Fred said, What the fuck is going on?
How the fuck did you know? I yelled.
What? Know what?
How did you know Id get in a fucking accident?
I didnt! What? What are you talking about?
Fuck you, Fred! What if ? What if ?
Then he said quietly, Youre not really blaming me, are you? I didnt say anything; the driving filled me. Then Fred said, calm and quiet, Can I get out?
I stopped really fast so that the wheels screeched and we slid. We were stopped in the middle of the street but no one was around. I didnt look at him. He opened the door and got out, and before he closed the door he said, Ill see ya.
I drove, then I turned a corner and another corner, and I drove.
I drove past Nanas house. Then I was on El Camino and I drove past Stanford. I turned off El Camino and drove past my elementary school. While I drove I thought up ideas. Id tell my dad that I crashed into a tree. Id tell him Id pay for the repairs.
Then the car started growling, the front right tire was rubbing against something. Then the hood was vibrating. I drove over to Colorado and then El Dorado and then a left on South Court and I was on my block.
Our house was at the end of a cul-de-sac. I didnt see my parents cars.
When I pulled into my driveway, I saw a police car in Mrs. Bachmans driveway next door. While I was parking in my driveway, I saw the cop who went with the car. He was walking toward me. Like a gentleman, I got out of the car.
The cop was pretty small. He had an RFK haircut, and his eyes looked like they belonged to someone dumb.
Hello, he said.
Hi, Chip, I said. I dont think he heard me; he was looking at my car. The front was smashed and the white paint from the Volvo was mixed into the mangled gray metal.
Whoo-eee, he said. Seems like youre the one Im looking for.
Yeah, Chip, I said.
Someone got your plates, buddy.
Then into the radio he said, I got im.
The backup came pretty quick. One and then two more and then there were five cars. A couple of the cops kept the lights flashing even after they parked and got out. Red was whipping everywhere, especially on the white of my garage door, round and round.
All the cops stood around me in their tight blue uniforms and the sky was golden above them. First RFK got my name and looked at my license. Then I had to hold my hand out and touch my nose while my neighbors watched. Another police cruiser slowed until it was in front of my driveway. There was a woman in the backseat with her face close to the glass. She didnt get out, but I saw her nodding. Her face was all jowls, thick and hanging. Then the car left.
Walk along this line, said a tough lady cop pointing down at a line in the driveway. She had a square face and shorter hair than mine. Hers was combed.
I tried to walk along the line between the two slabs of cement in the driveway, but I couldnt. It was spinning and jumping.
I cant, I said, and the words rolled around under my tongue.
I saw Mrs. Bachman hobble over to watch with the others. I was tired of being the show.
Say the alphabet backward, said the tough lady cop.
You say it, I said.
If youre trying to get wise , she said, but she got interrupted.
Looks like we got a wise one here, said the RFK cop.
Im not wise, Chip, I said. I just cant say the ABCs backward, I cant even do it normally.
Listen, smart-ass, said the tough lady cop, you can do this sobriety test, or we can go down to the hospital and they can do a blood test on you. Your choice.
Im drunk, I said. Take me downtown or wherever, I give in.