“I didn’t think you’d sleep with the first woman who’d agree to it,” Keira replied tersely.
“I know, I know,” Zach said, looking away and letting out a painful sigh. “I was hurting. That’s all I can say. I was so sad that you put something else before me that I wanted to put myself before you, put my needs first. It was… well, it was a shitty way to treat you.”
Keira just mumbled in agreement. In a few days’ time, once the dust had settled, she’d be grateful for Zach apologizing, but right now it was just stirring up a ton of feelings Keira didn’t have time to process.
“Okay, well thanks, I guess,” she finally said. “But, like Bryn said, we’ve got stuff to do.”
“Sure,” Zach said, looking over at the bedroom door that was now standing ajar. Bryn was evidently spying on them. He cast his gaze back at Keira and suddenly blurted, “Can you give me another chance?”
Keira’s eyebrows shot up her forehead. “What?”
“Please,” Zach said. “I don’t want to beg but I will. I know I don’t deserve you, especially after how I’ve behaved. But you drive me crazy because I love you. I can see that now.”
Keira was stunned. In the two years she and Zach had been together, love had never come into the equation. They’d been friends, partners, and equals, sure, but actually in love? She couldn’t be certain. They’d never said it, had never felt the need to speak those words. To hear him say them now touched her.
“Zach…” Keira began. “That’s sweet of you to say. But… I can’t. I’m sorry.”
She watched his chest deflate like a balloon, the hope sucked out of him with her words.
“I really blew it, huh?” he said, sounding depressed.
She shook her head. “It’s not that. I’ve been through a lot over the last few months. I’ve grown and learned and changed. I know what I want now.”
“And it’s not me,” he finished for her.
Keira nodded sadly. “I’m sorry. But no, it’s not you.”
“So no amount of begging for forgiveness will work?” Zach asked.
“No,” Keira told him, soft but firm. “It’s not about that. I’m not waiting to forgive you. I just don’t… I don’t want you like that. But we can be friends.”
“Sure,” Zach said, gazing at his feet. “We can be friends.”
Keira led a dejected Zachary from Bryn’s house. Self-pity certainly wasn’t going to help his case. She hoped he’d bounce back soon enough, and learn that he hadn’t really blown it with her, they just weren’t right, and that there’d be some other woman out there who was right for him.
As soon as she closed the door, Bryn hurried out of the bedroom.
“Sis!” she exclaimed, raising a hand for a high five. “That was awesome!”
Keira felt the edges of her lips twitch up. She clapped Bryn’s hand. “It was?”
“Yes! You totally held your own.” Bryn slung an arm around Keira’s shoulder. “You’re going to be just fine on this assignment, I know you are.”
Keira smiled, feeling filled with strength and resolve. Bryn was right. She was going to smash this assignment.
CHAPTER SIX
Bright and early the next morning, Keira received a grumpy call from the real estate agent saying the paperwork was ready for her to sign. Relieved, Keira hurried to her office and scribbled her name on the lease, before racing off for the airport.
Her head was spinning so much from having to rapidly sort things out, that it was only as she plopped herself into her seat on the airplane that it really sank in where she was and what was going on. At least this felt familiar to her now, being on a plane. It was nowhere near as intimidating as it once had been. For the first time, Keira felt much more positive about the future.
She couldn’t help but recall how the last time she’d boarded a plane Cristiano had been in the seat beside her. She could still remember the thrilling excitement she’d felt as they neared New York City, and the way his eyes had widened at the sight of a million lights below. That was all gone now. All she had left now were the memories. And for the first time since she’d ended things with Cristiano, her memories of him no longer stung. The thorny layer that had been around them before, causing her pain any time she tried to touch them, had finally gone.
She thought of the text from Cristiano’s new girlfriend, the one she’d been agonizing over. It felt so stupid to her now to have been that worked up over him seeing someone else. Of course it didn’t mean their relationship had meant nothing to him, it just meant that he was moving on with someone new.
The plane took to the skies, and the sensation of soaring made her stomach flip. Being so high above the world made her feel so free, so bold and independent. She smiled to herself and looked in her carry-on bag for the details of the upcoming cruise.
Heather had outdone herself this time. The itinerary was laminated. Probably as an attempt to mitigate against Keira’s tendency to spill coffee and fall off gondolas into canals. Heather had also bound the pages. It reminded Keira of something she would have produced in college, and she smirked to herself.
Keira flicked straight past the pages of important contact numbers – noting with a wry smile the empty space where a tour guide’s name and number would normally be – and skipped straight to the juicy details of the cruise. She’d hardly had time to get her head around the fact she was going on a cruise, that she’d be on a huge boat in the open sea. It would be a brand new experience for her. Her stomach leapt with anticipation. She glanced through the list of locations: Copenhagen, Denmark. Helsinki, Finland. Stockholm, Sweden.
Heather wasn’t one for adornment and there were no pictures included to further whet Keira’s appetite —too expensive to print in color, she thought in Heather’s voice – so she took her tablet from her bag and began to search online.
The images were stunning. Unlike the European cities she’d visited thus far, the buildings in the Scandinavian countries were different, peaked like alpine lodges. And there were vast swaths of countryside, beautiful evergreen trees, lakes of deep blue, and craggy mountains. She could hardly sit through the rest of the plane ride; she wanted to be there now!
Napping was always a good way to pass the time, so Keira settled into her airplane seat and let herself drift off to sleep.
She dreamed she was standing on the edge of a cliff, looking out at the ocean, deep blue and calm. Through the waves she saw a school of dolphins, jumping up before disappearing again. She watched, amazed, as they leaped in strange formations. It was almost like they were dancing, or performing synchronized routines for her. As though trying to impress her.
Keira noticed something peculiar about the dolphins then, about their faces. Even from this distance, she could make out their strangely human expressions, and the varying shades of their eyes. One had the same piercing blue eyes of Shane, and his crooked, cheeky smile to match. Another had deep chocolate eyes, a softness in its expression that reminded her of Cristiano. Yet another had a lost expression, with a look of mourning and regret behind its eyes. Zachary.
No sooner had she made these connections than their graceful acrobatics transformed into something new. Not a coordinated routine anymore, but something aggressive. A display of masculinity. The Cristiano dolphin plowed headfirst into the Zachary one, busting his nose, or snout, or whatever it was called on a dolphin. The Zachary one hit back, swishing his tail at both Cristiano and Shane. Shane just stood on the back of his tail, flapping his great flippers like this was all a huge joke. Then they piled in on one another, ripping shreds from one another as she watched on horrified, the blue ocean turning red before her eyes.
She tried to call out, “Stop! It’s not a competition!” But her voice was drowned out by the winds.