Axel carries the food into his kitchen. Beverly is sitting cross-legged on top of the kitchen table, right in the middle, and shes flipping through the bridal magazine Amelia Brud amp; Brollop.
Are you hungry? he asks.
I dont know if I want to wear white when I get married, Beverly says. Maybe light rose
I like white, Axel mumbles.
Axel prepares a tray and then the two of them ascend the stairs to the salon, where a red rococo sofa group is placed next to the large windows. As part of the grouping theres an eight-sided table from the eighteenth century. It shows how much that era appreciated intarsia; this motif shows a garden with peacocks and a musician, a woman playing the erhu.
Axel sets the table with the family china. It is imprinted in silver. He sets matching silver-gray napkins and heavy wineglasses beside the plates. He pours Coca-Cola into Beverlys glass and mineral water with slices of lime into his own.
Beverlys childish face has a tiny, chiseled chin above a fragile neck. The entire curve of her head is clear under the fuzz of hair. She drinks the entire glass, then stretches her upper body indolently; a beautiful, innocent movement. Axel thinks that shell do it exactly that way when shes an adult, maybe shell stretch that way even as an old lady.
Tell me more about the music, she asks him.
Where were we? Axel directs the remote toward his music system.
Alexander Malters incredibly perceptive interpretation of Arvo Parts Alina comes out of the speakers. Axel sets his glass down on the table. The bubbles of the mineral water dance. Axel wishes with all his heart that it were champagne in that glass, champagne to go with this food. He wishes for another hearts desire-sleeping pills to get through the night.
Axel pours more Coke into Beverlys glass. She looks at him in thanks. He stares right into her large, dark eyes and doesnt notice that hes over-pouring until the Coke starts spreading over the table. The entire Chinese landscape darkens as if its sun is covered by a cloud. The liquid film shimmers over the park with its peacocks.
Axel stands up. He sees Beverlys reflection in the glass of the windows. The curve of her chin is so strong and then he makes a sudden blinding connection. He realizes all at once that she resembles Greta.
How could he not have seen this before?
All he wants to do now is run away, run from this room, run from this house. Instead, he forces himself to get a cloth to wipe up the spill until his heart has a chance to slow and return to its normal rhythm.
Its not as if the two women would ever be confused one for the other, but now he spots one reminder, one trait after the other that they both share.
Axel stops and wipes his mouth. His hand is trembling.
There is not a single day when he does not think of Greta. And every day he does his best to forget.
The day after the competition still haunts him.
It was thirty-four years ago, but in his mind, everything since has been darkened by that event. His life was so new then; he was just seventeen, but all the bright hopes had come to an end.
62
The Johan Fredrik Berwald Competition was northern Europes most prestigious competition for young violinists. Many of the worlds young virtuosi had come to be set directly in this blinding spotlight, but after six rounds before a closed jury, the number had been whittled down to just three. Now it was the final round, and the three violinists left would compete in the concert hall as part of a performance conducted by the legendary Herbert Blomstedt, and the music would be broadcast live on television.
In music circles, it was a sensation that two of the finalists, Axel Riessen and Greta Stiernlood, had both studied at the Royal College of Music in Stockholm. The other finalist was Shiro Sasaki from Japan.
For Alice Riessen, an uncelebrated professional musician, her son Axels success was an enormous triumph. Especially now. Shed ignored the warnings from the schools principal about Axels absences from classes, sometimes for an entire day, and that he was growing careless, wasnt concentrating.
Once Axel and Greta had reached the third round, they were granted permission to devote their time to rehearsal. The competition had brought them together, and, amazingly, each was happy about the others success. Lately theyd been meeting at Axels house for mutual support.
Axel and his younger brother, Robert, had the run of seven rooms on the top floor of the house in Larkstaden. As a rule, Axel never practiced per se. Instead, he would find his way into a piece, exploring its undercurrent of sound as if in a new world. He loved to play and sometimes he was up long into the night playing his violin until even his toughened fingertips burned.
There was one day left before Axel and Greta would compete in the concert hall. Axel was sitting on the floor looking at the covers of his LPs spread out in front of his record player. He had three albums by David Bowie: Space Oddity, Aladdin Sane, and Hunky Dory.
His mother knocked on the door and came in with a bottle of Coca-Cola, two glasses with ice, and lemon slices. Axel was surprised to see her, but he thanked her, got up to take the tray, and set it on the coffee table.