8) Whats D. Carnegies advice about making friends?
9) Why is it important to show genuine interest in others?
10) What can develop a loyalty to a company in its customers?
11) How did D. Carnegies recommendations help Knaphle?
12) How did Knaphle describe changes in his work after he had followed D. Carnegies suggestions?
13) How did the nurses special interest to Martin Gingsberg profoundly affect his life?
14) Whats D. Carnegies principle about developing real friendships?
II
A simple way to make a good first impression
At a dinner party in New York, one of the guests, a woman who had inherited money, was eager to make a pleasing impression on everyone. She had squandered a modest fortune on sables, diamonds and pearls. But she hadnt done anything whatever about her face. It radiated sourness and selfishness. She didnt realize what everyone knows: namely, that the expression one wears on ones face is far more important than the clothes one wears on ones back.
Charles Schwab told me his smile had been worth a million dollars. And he was probably understating the truth. For Schwabs personality, his charm, his ability to make people like him, were almost wholly responsible for his extraordinary success; and one of the most delightful factors in his personality was his captivating smile.
Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you.
That is why dogs make such a hit. They are so glad to see us that they almost jump out of their skins. So, naturally, we are glad to see them.
A babys smile has the same effect.
Have you ever been in a doctors waiting room and looked around at all the glum faces waiting impatiently to be seen? Dr. Stephen K. Sproul, a veterinarian in Raytown, Missouri, told of a typical spring day when his waiting room was full of clients waiting to have their pets inoculated. No one was talking to anyone else, and all were probably thinking of a dozen other things they would rather be doing than wasting time sitting in that office. He told one of our classes: There were six or seven clients waiting when a young woman came in with a nine-month-old baby and a kitten. As luck would have it[30], she sat down next to a gentleman who was more than a little distraught about the long wait for service. The next thing he knew, the baby just looked up at him with that great big smile that is so characteristic of babies. What did that gentleman do? Just what you and I would do, of course; he smiled back at the baby. Soon he struck up a conversation with the woman about her baby and his grandchildren, and soon the entire reception room joined in, and the boredom and tension were converted into a pleasant and enjoyable experience.
An insincere grin? No. That doesnt fool anybody. We know it is mechanical and we resent it. I am talking about a real smile, a heartwarming smile, a smile that comes from within, the kind of smile that will bring a good price in the marketplace.
Professor James V. McConnell, a psychologist at the University of Michigan, expressed his feelings about a smile. People who smile, he said, tend to manage, teach and sell more effectively, and to raise happier children. Theres far more information in a smile than a frown. Thats why encouragement is a much more effective teaching device than punishment.
The employment manager of a large New York department store told me she would rather hire a sales clerk who hadnt finished grade school, if he or she has a pleasant smile, than to hire a doctor of philosophy with a somber face.
The effect of a smile is powerful even when it is unseen. Telephone companies throughout the United States have a program called phone power which is offered to employees who use the telephone for selling their services or products. In this program they suggest that you smile when talking on the phone. Your smile comes through in your voice.
Robert Cryer, manager of a computer department for a Cincinnati, Ohio, company, told how he had successfully found the right applicant for a hard-to-fill position:
I was desperately trying to recruit a Ph. D. in computer science for my department. I finally located a young man with ideal qualifications who was about to be graduated from Purdue University. After several phone conversations I learned that he had several offers from other companies, many of them larger and better known than mine. I was delighted when he accepted my offer. After he started on the job, I asked him why he had chosen us over the others. He paused for a moment and then he said: I think it was because managers in the other companies spoke on the phone in a cold, business-like manner, which made me feel like just another business transaction. Your voice sounded as if you were glad to hear from me that you really wanted me to be part of your organization. You can be assured, I am still answering my phone with a smile.
The chairman of the board of directors[31] of one of the largest rubber companies in the United States told me that, according to his observations, people rarely succeed at anything unless they have fun doing it. This industrial leader doesnt put much faith in the old adage that hard work alone is the magic key that will unlock the door to our desires. I have known people, he said, who succeeded because they had a rip-roaring good time conducting their business. Later, I saw those people change as the fun became work. The business had grown dull. They lost all joy in it, and they failed.