In the morning I walked a lot. I feel myself very good here and love the city, even dońt know why. While walking I was thinking about you from time to time as if we were together. Today I was not able to use internet yet, didńt answer to you and since dinner you are thinking about me and cause me a problem with your «want». But I hope I can write to you today in the evening, if Mary activates my i-net connection.
Till then bye! I know I may kiss you! And so I do! :)
A message from Kama:
«i was born a warrior
they gave me a desk to write haha
my heart has unfinished businesses
and just writing about them
wouldnt reduce my plight
I need to rise:|
I need to rise..
I need to rise.
when i am not lazy
i am
too much for this world :) {Only by the grace of Allah for a human is weak in reality}
To take on the whole world..
is the only choice left to abide
Should I sprint?
for i sprang
I saw death
i saw blood..
Sky had seen only a few lovers
God gave me such a heart to fight
Am i coward
Who am i?
I probably let myself take over me!
May be just another experiment gone wrong..? haha
For everyday i wait to jump
i get mired deep in this world that is less than a swine»
Destiny comes in silence the life is not just a book, nobody knows when one «chapter» is almost over and another has just begun
Даже если бы я совсем не хотел убивать тебя и причинять тебе зла, это не всегда возможно. Не надо забывать, что мы неуклюжие материальные существа в этом грубом материальном мире, и раз прикоснувшись, уже не можем в полной мере отвечать за последствия.
А если не прикасаться
Если не прикасаться, то никакого сюжета не будет, и не о чем тебе будет писать твои романы.
Would you like to play babes? Lets start! Im here!
[08.10.201* 15:29:32] Amir: Hello! Please add me to your Contact list.
[08.10.201* 15:29:32] Natalie: Natalie B* has shared contact details with Amir M*.
Amir: Hiiii
[08.10.201* 15:29:52] Amir: welcome to my skype
[08.10.201* 15:29:59] *** Call to Amir, no answer.
hiiii lovely
[08.10.201* 15:31:19] *** Call ended ***
Amir: so hows it going in Germany? call again, your video isnt working, Natalie, i am sorry, got disconnected, call again
*** Call to Amir, duration 00:59. ***
Natalie: can you see me now? does it work?
Amir: yea, looking gorgeous
Natalie: ok, then bye
Amir: hahahahahah
*** Call ended ***
Amir: why? ok, so hows it going in Germany? and what job are you going to do?
Natalie: all is fine here, job is rather easy to help one old lady about the house, the same almost as I did at home, working in Orphanage, my last official work, but here I am paid twice.
Amir: thats noble. Hows your son? is he with you too?
Natalie: hope he is all right, he stays with his grandparents and I write him daily and also spoke with him on skype yesterday
Amir: thats nice, its hard to stay away from loved ones, i am also planning to visit Germany one day
Natalie: ok, come! I like it here, in Köln, but i didnt see other places, so also hope to see one day
Amir: right what about seeing all places together? as you are telling you are going to stay there long so i can plan and come
Natalie: strange man, that all I can say!
Amir: hahahahhahaha yea, I am
Natalie: I am not young; I have no intention for any romantic relations, as I told you in the very beginning
Amir: am i proposing you or just asking you to meet and watch Germany, these are two different things, totally opposite
Natalie: may be, may be its just I am not a kid :) how do you imagine this journey together?
Amir: well maybe i like you and want to be a good friend, age doesnt matter, if i feel i want to be more than friend ever i will tell you because you know me, i am a very fast individual and i can tell you anything but right now you are good friend
Natalie: we will see, I have no objection for good friendship, but then dońt tell me Ive warned you!
Amir: why are you so possessive? life is very beautiful and all men are not same
you should give one chance to yourself to make your life beautiful
Natalie: my life is beautiful always! and then you have very short memory, mister! didńt I tell you, my heart doesnt belong to me now
well i think its enough for today thank you very much! and bye!
Amir: hahahahhaha thats very nice: every time you say its enough for today and bye, what is this?
Natalie: I want to walk a bit, not only stay at home, and I have my free time only now, after dinner, from 3 to 6.30
Amir: oh ok no problem, will catch you later, take care and enjoy your time
Natalie: thanks! you too
Amir: thanks Natalie, have a great day, bye bye;)
Я немного подумала и поняла, что начать надо совсем с другого места. С кладбища. Обычно на кладбище все истории, так или иначе, заканчиваются, ну, а наша почему-то хочет начаться именно оттуда.
Итак
Часть 1. КЁЛЬН
My life belongs to you and you only
Aamir
В начале октября 201* года на кладбище Мелатен в самом центре старинного немецкого города Кёльна на скамейке у распятия в конце одной из аллей сидела женщина в чёрном плаще до пят, покрывавшем всю её фигуру, живописными тяжёлыми складками спускавшимся к ногам. Она сидела так неподвижно, что её вполне можно было принять за одно из надгробных изваяний, которыми изобилует это кладбище. Но она была жива и дышала, а на опущенных ресницах дрожали слёзы.
Она молилась
А я не собираюсь рассказывать ни её историю, ни биографию, ни родословную, ни даже как и почему эта русская оказалась в Кёльне (где только нет русских, право, ониповсюду!), но я знаю, о чём она молилась, и я скажу вам.
«Господи, говорила она, устремляя свой внутренний взор к распятию, я так устала, так измучилась душою, Ты же знаешь!» и всё такое прочее в том же жалостливом ключе, как обычно необычным было то, что она сразу же услышала тихий и кроткий ответ: «Потерпи ещё немного».