Is that a good sigh? A bad sigh?
She chewed her lip. I dont know.
Then she shook her head and forked up some salmon. Im a liar. Its a good sigh. Also, the salmon is fantastic.
He preened a moment as he grinned before letting her off the hook. So why are you eating microwave burritos for lunch, anyway? The library isnt that far from some pretty great little cafés.
Im a horrible cook. Sometimes I cant get away from work for an hour for this or that reason, and I need something quick. Plus, I eat out. A lot. Its better than a frozen diet meal, which tastes like tears and loneliness. I hate them. And yet, my freezer is full of them.
He wrinkled his nose and then gave her curves a covetous look. Why in Gods name do you need diet meals?
I love doughnuts and I hate exercise.
Sex is great exercise. Im just saying.
Hmm. Im not sure its a good selling point when youre trying to get one woman into bed to reference other women.
He cringed and then caught the twinkle in her eyes. Oh, my God. Youre teasing me.
She shrugged. Some people think Im funny. Even those of us who shush others for a living know how to laugh.
He snickered and then paused as he imagined her all stern in a pencil skirt and a button-down white shirt. Maybe with a ruler and some really high black pumps and stockings with the line down the back.
Leading up to those twin red bows.
Clearing his throat, he drained the rest of his champagne and poured them both some more.
Why libraries?
I was in my third year as an undergrad and I went to a job fair. I wandered up and down the aisles, took brochures. Took notes. Asked questions dutifully. And I ended up at the MLIS peoplemasters in library and information sciencespent forty-five minutes with them. I liked them. I liked what they did. Until that, Id been considering getting a teaching degree. One of the folks I met that day urged me to apply to the graduate MLIS program, and I did.
They continued to eat as she spoke.
So I looked around and kept at it, and he was so helpful and kind and open. I applied and got in. She paused. Of course, by the time I was ready to graduate, the economy had changed. With all the cuts to libraries, I wasnt sure what would happen. Id been working part-time in a library near campus, so I knew how tight things were. I considered jobs outside public librarieslaw firms need librarians, for instance. Colleges, universities, that sort of thing. But...the public library is important. I really wanted to pursue a position that way. This job here in town opened up, and one of my friends told me about it, and thats pretty much history.
You probably could have made a lot more money elsewhere.
Her eyes lost that teasing light and she got serious. Libraries are important, Paddy. Libraries are not just a place to check out books. Theyre a haven, a safe place for so many kids. You cannot undervalue that. Being a place, a home for people who need to escape their own unsafe places is something libraries provide. Its a priceless thing. Some kids dont have any adults in their lives who give a shit about them. They can go to the childrens librarian who does something as simple as holding back a book she thinks that kid would like, and it changes everything. I make enough to pay my bills and fortunately, I have family money, too. That I have the ability to be part of someones safe place means everything to me.
Right then, Paddy fell a little bit in love with Natalie Clayton with her ferocity about kids and libraries.
Go down a layer or two and youre a fierce bitch about kids. I like that a lot.
She shrugged.
Family money?
She looked away a moment and then nodded. Yes. I considered giving it all up, but in the end, I like using it to help other people.
What does your family think?
Lets talk about you for a while. Why did you stay here in Hood River instead of heading to L.A. or Seattle or New York?
I like all those places. I actually do have a condo in Manhattan and a place in Santa Barbara, where I head when I need the ocean. But my family is here. We have enough land that I can be left alone when I need it, but my brothers and my parents are close enough that I can get on my bike or take a brisk walk and be on someones doorstep in a few minutes. I help when Im around. We built a studio in an old converted barn, and we do all our own production there. I know where everything is. No one bothers us in town, really. I guess at the end of it, this is my home. Everyone should have a home.
She smiled at him and it made him happy.
I like Hood River a lot. Love it in the fall best. Love the colors of the leaves. So gorgeous.
I thought you grew up in Medina?
No. My grandparents lived there. I grew up in Los Angeles, actually. I visited a few times every year, but I grew up in a world where the leaves never changed.
Where at in L.A.?
Whittier. Its a suburb east of downtown. So you mentioned a sister-in-law? When did your brother get married?
She was touchy about her family, obviously.
Lets see, um, about a year ago. Yeah, theyre coming up on their anniversary soon. Do you have siblings?
I grew up thinking no. But a few years ago, my grandmother let it slip after five glasses of wine that a person I thought was my second cousin is actually my sister.
Wow, thats some daytime-talk-show stuff right there. How did she react? Did she know?
She doesnt know and really, shes better off not knowing. Not like shes missing out on any sort of stellar parenting.
You dont want to tell her? To have a relationship with her? Paddy couldnt imagine not going to someone who was his brother or sister. He may fight like crazy with his brothers, but he couldnt imagine not having them all in his life.
A shadow of grief passed across Natalies face for the briefest of breaths. She grew up in a relatively normal household with both parents. Shes married and has three kids of her own. She runs a stationery store with her husband in a small town in Nevada. Her life is good. Who am I to tell her that her mother had an affair and everything shes ever believed is a lie? What right do I have to do that?
He sat back. He hadnt thought of it like that, but she was right. Took the weight of knowing, hed figured, but shed done it to protect her sister.
Im sorry. You didnt have such a great childhood, then?
A shrug. I have a good life now. Thats what counts. So is it weird being a rock star?
Yes. Sometimes its totally weird. Having a conversation with this woman was an intricate process. Shed revealed things, personal things, but there were other topics she wove around and avoided.
He wanted to know her. All her wounds and sore spots as well as things that made her smile.
Like how?
Well, you know, Im just Paddy. Ive been me my whole life. So Ill be walking down the street in Manhattan and suddenly someone will gasp and call my name out and its like...being recognized as Paddy Hurley from Sweet Hollow Ranch has its own unique tone. Its great. I mean, Im happy people love our music and it pays my bills and enables me to do what I love and travel all over the world and stuff. But its an odd thing to have someone shake and cry just because theyve seen me on my way back from grabbing a coffee.