I dessay I should, if I could, he answered, with a mingled glance of mischief and pain, but if youll undertake to carry me, old cock, Ill be appy to go.
Ill send you in a cab, my poor boy, returned the butler, and git a cabman as Im acquainted with to take care of you.
All right! go aead, ye cripples, returned the boy, as the cook approached him with a cup of warm soup.
Oh! aint it prime! he said, opening his eyes very wide indeed, and smacking his lips. I think Ill go in for a smashed pin every day o my life for a drop o that stuff. Surely it must be wot they drinks in eaven! Have ee got much more o the same on and?
Never mind, but you drink away while youve got the chance, replied the amiable cook; theres the cab coming, so youve no time to lose.
Vell, I am sorry I aint able to old more, an my pockets wont old it neither, bein the wuss for wear. Thankee, missus.
He managed, by a strong effort, to dispose of a little more soup before the cab drew up.
Where do you live? asked the butler, as he placed the boy carefully in the bottom of the cab with his unkempt head resting on a hassock, which he gave him to understand was a parting gift from the housemaid.
Vere do I live? he repeated. Vy, mostly in the streets; my last ome was a sugar barrel, the one before was a donkey-cart, but I do sometimes condescend to wisit my parents in their mansion ouse in Vitechapel.
And what is your name? Sir Richard may wish to inquire for youperhaps.
May he? Oh! Im sorry I aint got my card to leave, but you just tell him, Johnis it, or Thomas?Ah! Thomas. I knowed it couldnt elp to be one or tother;you just tell your master that my name is Robert, better known as Bobby, Frog. But Ive lots of aliases, if that name dont please im. Good-bye, Thomas. Farewell, and if for ever, thenyou know the rest o the quotation, if your eddications not bin neglected, wich is probable it was. Oh! by the way. This assik is the gift of the ouse-maid? You observe the answer, cabby, in case you and I may differ about it ereafter.
Yes, said the amused butler, a gift from Jessie.
Ah!jus so. An shes tender-earted an ony fifteen. Wots er tother name? Summers, eh? Vell, its prettier than Vinters. Tell er Ill not forget er. Now, cabmanome!
A few minutes more, and Bobby Frog was on his way to the mansion in Whitechapel, highly delighted with his recent feast, but suffering extremely from his broken limb.
Meanwhile, the brown ponyhaving passed a bold costermonger, who stood shouting defiance at it, and waving both arms till it was close on him, when he stepped quickly out of its wayeluded a dray-man, and entered on a fine sweep of street, where there seemed to be no obstruction worth mentioning. By that time it had left the agonised father far behind.
The day was fine; the air bracing. The utmost strength of poor little Diana, and she applied it well, made no impression whatever on the ponys tough mouth. Influences of every kind were favourable. On the illogical principle, probably, that being in for a penny justified being in for a pound, the pony laid himself out for a glorious run. He warmed to his work, caused the dust to fly, and the clothes-basket to advance with irregular bounds and swayings as he scampered along, driving many little dogs wild with delight, and two or three cats mad with fear. Gradually he drew towards the more populous streets, and here, of course, the efforts on the part of the public to arrest him became more frequent, also more decided, though not more successful. At last an inanimate object effected what man and boy had failed to accomplish.
In a wild effort to elude a demonstrative cabman near the corner of one of the main thoroughfares, the brown pony brought the wheels of the vehicle into collision with a lamp-post. That lamp-post went down before the shock like a tall head of grain before the sickle. The front wheels doubled up into a sudden embrace, broke loose, and went across the road, one into a greengrocers shop, the other into a chemists window. Thus diversely end many careers that begin on a footing of equality! The hind-wheels went careering along the road like a new species of bicycle, until brought up by a donkey-cart, while the basket chariot rolled itself violently round the lamp-post, like a shattered remnant, as if resolved, before perishing, to strangle the author of all the mischief. As to the pony, it stopped, and seemed surprised at first by the unexpected finale, but the look quickly changedor appeared to changeto one of calm contentment as it surveyed the ruin.
But what of the fair little charioteer? Truly, in regard to her, a miracle, or something little short of one, had occurred. The doctrine that extremes meet contains much truth in ittruth which is illustrated and exemplified more frequently, we think, than is generally supposed. A tremendous accident is often much less damaging to the person who experiences it than a slight one. In little Dianas case, the extremes had met, and the result was absolute safety. She was shot out of her basket carriage after the manner of a sky-rocket, but the impulse was so effective that, instead of causing her to fall on her head and break her pretty little neck, it made her perform a complete somersault, and alight upon her feet. Moreover, the spot on which she alighted was opportune, as well as admirably suited to the circumstances.
At the moment, ignorant of what was about to happen, police-constable Number 666we are not quite sure of what divisionin all the plenitude of power, and blue, and six-feet-two, approached the end of a street entering at right angles to the one down which our little heroine had flown. He was a superb specimen of humanity, this constable, with a chest and shoulders like Hercules, and the figure of Apollo. He turned the corner just as the child had completed her somersault, and received her two little feet fairly in the centre of his broad breast, driving him flat on his back more effectively than could have been done by the best prize-fighter in England!
Number 666 proved a most effectual buffer, for Di, after planting her blow on his chest, sat plump down on his stomach, off which she sprang in an agony of consternation, exclaiming
Oh! I have killed him! Ive killed him! and burst into tears.
No, my little lady, said Number 666, as he rose with one or two coughs and replaced his helmet, youve not quite done for me, though youve come nearer the mark than any man has ever yet accomplished. Come, now, what can I do for you? Youre not hurt, I hope?
This sally was received with a laugh, almost amounting to a cheer, by the half-horrified crowd which had quickly assembled to witness, as it expected, a fatal accident.
Hurt? oh! no, Im not hurt, exclaimed Di, while tears still converted her eyes into blue lakelets as she looked anxiously up in the face of Number 666; but Im quite sure you must be hurtawfully. Im so sorry! Indeed I am, for I didnt mean to knock you down.
This also was received by the crowd with a hearty laugh, while Number 666 sought to comfort the child by earnestly assuring her that he was not hurt in the leastonly a little stunned at first, but that was quite gone.
Wot does she mean by knockin of im down? asked a small butchers boy, who had come on the scene just too late, of a small bakers boy who had, happily, been there from the beginning.