Nastya finished the salad, washed her bowl, stood under a hot shower for a quarter hour to relax and warm up, and crawled into bed. She was going to call her husbands parents in Zhukovsky maybe he had gone to see them. She was reaching for the phone when she stopped herself. Dont. He might think she was checking up. And what if he werent there and his parents didnt know where he was? Whatever else she may want, catching Lyoshka was not one of her goals. Not because she was a hundred percent sure of his fidelity. Alexei was a normal male who could fall for a beautiful, interesting, sexy woman, so unlike Nastya, who was unattractive, cool, and absolutely without sex appeal. From the point of view of probability, it was quite possible, but Nastya never felt that she had to know about it. What for? Of her almost thirty-six years, she had known Chistyakov twenty. More than half her life. They would grow old together, they would always be together, and no matter what happened, they would be best friends. This assertion had been tested by time and was unimpeachable. And then, was she herself without guilt? Certainly not.
In other words, she did not call Lyoshkas parents. But just as she was putting out the light, the phone rang.
Nastya? asked an uncertain voice.
It was Pavel Kamensky, Alexanders father. And Nastyas, naturally.
Yes, its me, she said, trying to hide her surprise.
Kamensky senior rarely called. He divorced Nastyas mother when Nastya was very small, and he communicated with his daughter on major holidays and then by phone. Of course, after Nastya became friends with Alexander, his son by a second marriage, and Alexanders wife, Dasha, Pavel started calling more frequently. But he was still a total stranger as far as Nastya was concerned she felt nothing for him, neither warmth nor dislike. Nastya adored her mothers second husband, her stepfather, and had called him Papa all her life. Pavel Kamensky did not really exist for her.
Nastya, Im calling to warn you. He stopped for a bit. Theres a problem with little Dasha, and your Alexei went to help Alexander.
Whats the matter with Dasha? Nastya asked quickly.
Well, its, uh, well Kamensky muttered, but Nastya understood.
Dasha was pregnant, in her fourth month. She must have miscarried.
How did it happen?
I dont know. Alexander called about two hours ago from the hospital. He said that Alexei had to bring some important doctor. He asked me to call you so that you wouldnt worry. Dont be angry, Nastya, that your husband was called out of the house at night, but Alexander is in such a panic, hes so worried about Dasha. Can Alexei stay with him a bit. Is that all right?
Its fine. Thanks for calling, Nastya said.
Thanks for calling today instead of tomorrow, she added mentally. Ive been home an hour. If I were a different person, I would have gone nuts in the last hour wondering where my husband had gone without warning, without even a note. And you, daddy dear, instead of calling every five minutes trying to catch me the minute I walk in so that Im spared worry, call only now. Were you watching a movie on TV? Lucky for you that Im a calm person and dont panic at the drop of a hat. A problem with little Dasha You never called me little Nastya. Im not jealous, God knows. Dasha is a marvelous creature, a living miracle with blue eyes, I love her myself and I cant imagine a person who wouldnt love her. But Im your daughter. Or am I? Am I just the child of a woman you used to be married to, accidentally, stupidly, and for a very short time?
It wasnt interesting thinking about Kamensky, he meant too little in Nastyas life. She was much more worried about her sister-in-laws health. Their first child, little Sasha, was under a year old, born in early June. Nastya had not been so sure that it was a good idea for Sasha to have a second baby so soon. But she really wanted a girl. And Alexander was so happy! Poor Dasha, it would be a pity if she lost the baby. However, she was still young. Twenty. Shed be able to have a dozen more if she wanted. The important thing was for nothing serious to happen that would affect her ability to conceive and carry full term.
So, Lyoshka was somewhere at a hospital with Alexander. Well, that was a good idea, Lyoshka was a rational and calm person, sometimes too much so, but in this case it was just what was needed to restrain panicky Alexander. And he did have superior physicians among his friends. He had once worked halftime at a medical technology institute, developing diagnostic computer programs. Ever since then Lyoshka had a wide circle of medical friends. He must have brought a luminary with him. Nastya imagined Alexander calling and shouting that Dasha was hemorrhaging and he didnt know what to do. Dasha was dying! Alexander Kamensky had the amazing ability to see the worst-case scenario and think that the situation was beyond repair. Interestingly, this did not extend to his business. It appeared only in regards to Dasha. He was probably madly in love with her, losing his reason when something happened to her. Naturally, Lyoshka rushed off to help his brother-in-law and handle things. No time for notes.
Suddenly Nastya put on the light and reached for the phone. She had dialed Solovyovs number before she could answer the question: why was she calling?
Did I wake you? she asked guiltily when she heard his soft voice.
No, I go to bed late.
How are things?
Fine, thanks. Is that why you called?
To tell the truth, I dont know why I called. But apparently, it was something I really wanted to do. Otherwise I wouldnt have done it.
Makes sense, he chuckled. Even in such subtle and emotional issues you seek to operate on logic. How are things with you?
Fine. As usual.
Are you at home?
Of course. Where else would I be at this time of night? What about your husband? Arent you worried that he might hear you talking to me?
No. If I were afraid, I wouldnt have called.
More logic. In any case, Im glad you called.
Really?
Really.
She heard the intonation in his voice that used to make her head spin.
Man gets used to good things very quickly, Solovyov went on. The day before yesterday you called me, yesterday you visited, and today I had the feeling that something was missing. You called just now and I realized what it was. I miss you.
Me too, she said with a smile. Ill come over tomorrow if you dont have any other plans.
What time?
Around eight. Is that all right?
Ill be waiting.
Kisses, she said softly. Good night.
There, Solovyov. You miss me already. And why? Lets not think about me, Ive always been a sucker where you were concerned. But you? You didnt even think me human. I was nothing more than a dangerous daughter of my mother, someone who could cause a lot of trouble if not handled properly. A device. Back then, you were afraid of my mother, and you were afraid that if you rejected me, your advisor would be angry, and if you had an affair with me, she would bring up questions of divorce and marriage to me. You did not love me and did not want to marry me. But it never occurred to you that my mother would never hear of our affair. You were sure that I told her everything. Actually, I never had that habit. Mother learned about it many years later and, I must say, was very surprised. In other words, afraid of my mother, you started sleeping with me, and even more afraid of her, you broke it off. But now, a relationship with me is not threat to you at all. Youre not married, and I am. Therefore, you are insured against matrimonial demands from my side. And if they did come up, your illness is your best defense. No one could force you to marry anyone. So you can flirt. Your life is boring and lonely now, and even though you pretend not to need anyone, its not true. You were always the life of the party, the center of attention, and you cant break the habits of a lifetime in just two years. You need to have a person who loves you around. And your feelings dont matter here. You could deceive to get what you want. You say that you miss me? Perhaps. Tomorrow youll start acting as if you cared about me. And that wont be true. You will pretend so that I keep coming back, so that you can feel my love once again, sense it and breathe it. Youre an emotional vampire. God, I used to love you so much.