Jerry acted immediately comforting, supportive text messages, emails and follow up phone calls to his two best mates, his casual attitude actually helping to relieve their respective moods. But it didnt last long as Tom soon discovered that the insurance on his Ferrari hadnt been validated and approved and Eve received her nightmare client in person when he was only supposed to call to arrange an appointment. Naturally, the pair of them were at their lowest ebb by the end of the day and even Jerry was becoming concerned at what to do. Suddenly, he had a revelation. Tonight, the same night every week, the trio usually joined up for dinner. Theyd been doing this for nearly three years, sans holidays and illnesses. Jerry understood he had to make tonight special, spectacular even to try and cheer his friends up after their respective disastrous day.
Jerry ate anything. Jerry ate everything. Tom and Eve were different though, their diets restricted to their chosen favourites irrespective of the cuisine. Jerry thought they were boring, unadventurous, dull, so he thought it was time to go to the extremes because nothing else would do it. There was one thing the three of them universally disliked, only one cuisine among hundreds they had always agreed was taboo, and that was spicy food, specifically, spicy Thai food. Sure they ate spicy Mexican food, spicy Chinese and Indian food, damn it, The Colonels Spicy Buffalo Wings were the best too but somewhere, somehow, the three of them had agreed never to eat Thai food. Jerry couldnt recall when and why they had decided this but what he did know was after such an epic day, they needed to go to the extremes.
He emailed them both an address and a directive to meet him there at seven sharp this evening because they were all going out on a limb tonight. He didnt tell them the name of the restaurant because tonight, they were going to live dangerously. It was now or never and he couldnt see either of them refusing such was the downer they were suffering. Jerry was late getting to the restaurant and Tom was already there, naturally, walking the footpath out the front taking in the glowing neon announcing THAI FOOD. They shook grips and bumped shoulders as old mates do but Tom kept glancing at the sign. He made it clear he was not impressed with the idea but Jerry convinced him it was worth a try. Eve arrived just as Tom acquiesced and Jerry had to repeat the process but was at least supported by Tom now. After the day they had, what could be worse was the general feeling. Jerry was congratulating himself on a good decision.
All of them drank too many Phuket Lagers and Singha beers before attacking the seemingly unpronounceable menu. Their courage was up, albeit alcohol fuelled. A further round of beers followed after they ordered a kind of soup named Tom Yum (Eve chose this, because of Tom of course and Jerrys eyes narrowed a little when she giggled her reasoning), Jerry chose the only dish he thought he could pronounce, Larp, but the waitress laughed and told him it was spoken as LarB, and Tom boringly decided on a Thai beef salad, because salads are not spicy are they! Neither Tom or Eve had eaten that day and both decided, with a gutful of beer behind them, that a little spicy Thai food wasnt going to hurt anybody. They laughed at Jerrys explanation of extreme dining and none of them could deduce who had decided Thai food was sacrosanct.
The first course arrived, the Tom Yum, the aroma permeated even their close to totally inebriated minds. They ate, gasped at the tartness, hissed at the sweetness and drank liberally to deny the harsh chili bite. Eve got the nose runs and used half the napkins stemming the flow, their loud laughter now was anesthetic bolstered by beer. Thai food wasnt hot at all they laughed, but Tom was also sweating copiously from the forehead to go with Eves never ceasing nose runs. The Larp arrived before they finished their soups, LarB Larb, Larb they chorused loudly to other non-amused customers. Larp is served in a lettuce leaf and smells like heaven, even after the addictive aroma of the Tom Yum, it was something else again. They all plunged in, eating with their hands and even Jerry had to admit, it was firey-hot, but no-way was he going to admit it to the other pair. Firey-hot yes, delicious, a big yes! Toms sweat was making it hard to see as it ran down over his eyes, Eve felt like she was swimming in her nose runs. But oh, this food was so delectable.
Tom advised them to enjoy because next up was just a salad, which would naturally cool their palettes. The Thai Beef Salad arrived. This dish topped the first two, the aroma so tantalising they forgot their burning mouths, their beer filled heaving stomachs, their sweat and runny noses and they enthusiastically dove in, the sweet, salty, spicy beef melting on their tongues and even though none were hungry anymore, driving them on to eat more, more, more! They ate the salad, slammed it down followed by more beer and Eve was the first to go. She tipped the last of her beer down her throat, looked at Tom and Jerry and her eyes seemed to pop out of her head like a cartoon character, then her head fell face first straight into the plate in front of her. Jerry laughed out loud, he too suffering the sweats and a burning mouth but nothing more. He looked at Tom expecting to see him guffawing at the unfortunate Eve but instead, Toms head was wobbling like a dashboard mascot. The sweat running off him had soaked his shirt and created a sheen over his face that looked like varnish. His head too plummeted face first into the table but without the bellylaughing eye pops! Jerry did laugh though, what a night it had been and they would all be able to laugh together tomorrow and evermore about their calamitous day.
The waitress approached, she looked concerned. She had been concerned from the beginning when they began heavily drinking and now it was even worse. She looked at the laughing man, his face red and sweaty but he just looked drunk. She went to the woman first and gently touched her neck, feeling, hoping, praying for a pulse. There was none. The man beside her looked white and sickly but she thought she could see some slight movement but a similar check also discovered no pulse. She looked at the laughing man again, her eyes full of grief and anger.
Why you tell me on telephone you all love very hot food, why you do this, why, you stupid, stupid man? She ran off toward the phone and Jerry just kept laughing.
============== THE END ================
W157 You or your best friend will survive but not both
BACHELOR PARTY
Fool.
Asshole.
Dickwad.
Moron.
Fu.. Gods sake, stop it!
Sure, pussy!
Brandon and Lee. Friends since, well since God was a boy! They were virtually inseparable after first meeting at kindergarten a million years ago it seemed to their long suffering parents and respective siblings. Never had the boys, now men, ever done an individual thing without the other, except for the obligatory responsibilities as members of different families but even then, on many occasions one or the other had managed to accompany his mate and their family to a boring visit at Aunt Ediths (she of the unknown and spectacularly bad culinary ability) or a picnic in the field adjacent to the retirement home where Great Uncle Fred was pining away the last of his days. Friends for life. They even established their own business together, now a successful construction company, B&L Enterprises. The success in business, long term comradeship and life in general they both put down to the rock solid foundation of their love and support for each other as friends.