Girls, he grunted, with a nod.
Would it bother you if I took Jacob?
Id only picked the name because I knew of my fathers preference for Jacob, but I quickly wished I hadnt; Edwards teeth clenched together with an audible snap.
My father struggled to compose himself before he answered. Yes, he said in an unconvincing voice. That would bother me.
Youre a rotten liar, Dad.
Bella
Its not like Im headed off to Vegas to be a showgirl or anything. Im going to see Mom, I reminded him. Shes just as much my parental authority as you are.
He threw me a withering look.
Are you implying something about Moms ability to look after me?
Charlie flinched at the threat implicit in my question.
Youd better hope I dont mention this to her, I said.
Youd better not, he warned. Im not happy about this, Bella.
Theres no reason for you to be upset.
He rolled his eyes, but I could tell the storm was over.
I turned to pull the plug out of the sink. So my homework is done, your dinner is done, the dishes are done, and Im not grounded. Im going out. Ill be back before ten-thirty.
Where are you going? His face, almost back to normal, flushed light red again.
Im not sure, I admitted. Ill keep it within a ten-mile radius, though. Okay?
He grunted something that did not sound like approval, and stalked out of the room. Naturally, as soon as Id won the fight, I began to feel guilty.
Were going out? Edward asked, his voice low but enthusiastic.
I turned to glower at him. Yes. I think Id like to speak to you alone.
He didnt look as apprehensive as I thought he should.
I waited to begin until we were safely in his car.
What was that? I demanded.
I know you want to see your mother, Bellayouve been talking about her in your sleep. Worrying actually.
I have?
He nodded. But, clearly, you were too much of a coward to deal with Charlie, so I interceded on your behalf.
Interceded? You threw me to the sharks!
He rolled his eyes. I dont think you were in any danger.
I told you I didnt want to fight with Charlie.
Nobody said that you had to.
I glowered at him. I cant help myself when he gets all bossy like thatmy natural teenage instincts overpower me.
He chuckled. Well, thats not my fault.
I stared at him, speculating. He didnt seem to notice. His face was serene as he gazed out the windshield. Something was off, but I couldnt put my finger on it. Or maybe it was just my imagination again, running wild like it had this afternoon.
Does this sudden urge to see Florida have anything to do with the party at Billys place?
His jaw flexed. Nothing at all. It wouldnt matter if you were here or on the other side of the world, you still wouldnt be going.
It was just like with Charlie beforejust like being treated as a misbehaving child. I gritted my teeth together so I wouldnt start shouting. I didnt want to fight with Edward, too.
Edward sighed, and when he spoke his voice was warm and velvet again. So what do you want to do tonight? he asked.
Can we go to your house? I havent seen Esme in so long.
He smiled. Shell like that. Especially when she hears what were doing this weekend.
I groaned in defeat.
We didnt stay out late, as Id promised. I was not surprised to see the lights still on when we pulled up in front of the houseI knew Charlie would be waiting to yell at me some more.
Youd better not come inside, I said. It will only make things worse.
His thoughts are relatively calm, Edward teased. His expression made me wonder if there was some additional joke I was missing. The corners of his mouth twitched, fighting a smile.
Ill see you later, I muttered glumly.
He laughed and kissed the top of my head. Ill be back when Charlies snoring.
The TV was loud when I got inside. I briefly considered trying to sneak past him.
Could you come in here, Bella? Charlie called, sinking that plan.
My feet dragged as I took the five necessary steps.
Whats up, Dad?
Did you have a nice time tonight? he asked. He seemed ill at ease. I looked for hidden meanings in his words before I answered.
Yes, I said hesitantly.
What did you do?
I shrugged. Hung out with Alice and Jasper. Edward beat Alice at chess, and then I played Jasper. He buried me.
I smiled. Edward and Alice playing chess was one of the funniest things Id ever seen. Theyd sat there nearly motionless, staring at the board, while Alice foresaw the moves he would make and he picked the moves she would make in return out of her head. They played most of the game in their minds; I think theyd each moved two pawns when Alice suddenly flicked her king over and surrendered. It took all of three minutes.
Charlie hit the mute buttonan unusual action.
Look, theres something I need to say. He frowned, looking very uncomfortable.
I sat still, waiting. He met my gaze for a second before shifting his eyes to the floor. He didnt say anything more.
What is it, Dad?
He sighed. Im not good at this kind of thing. I dont know how to start. . . .
I waited again.
Okay, Bella. Heres the thing. He got up from the couch and started pacing back and forth across the room, looking as his feet all the time. You and Edward seem pretty serious, and there are some things that you need to be careful about. I know youre an adult now, but youre still young, Bella, and there are a lot of important things you need to know when you . . . well, when youre physically involved with
Oh, please, please no! I begged, jumping to my feet. Please tell me you are not trying to have a sex talk with me, Charlie.
He glared at the floor. I am your father. I have responsibilities. Remember, Im just as embarrassed as you are.
I dont think thats humanly possible. Anyway, Mom beat you to the punch about ten years ago. Youre off the hook.
Ten years ago you didnt have a boyfriend, he muttered unwillingly. I could tell he was battling with his desire to drop the subject. We were both standing up, looking at the floor, and facing away from each other.
I dont think the essentials have changed that much, I mumbled, and my face had to be as red as his. This was beyond the seventh circle of Hades; even worse was realizing that Edward had known this was coming. No wonder hed seemed so smug in the car.
Just tell me that you two are being responsible, Charlie pled, obviously wishing a pit would open in the floor so that he could fall in.
Dont worry about it, Dad, its not like that.
Not that I dont trust you, Bella, but I know you dont want to tell me anything about this, and you know I dont really want to hear it. I will try to be open-minded, though. I know the times have changed.
I laughed awkwardly. Maybe the times have, but Edward is very old-fashioned. You have nothing to worry about.
Charlie sighed. Sure he is, he muttered.
Ugh! I groaned. I really wish you were not forcing me to say this out loud, Dad. Really. But . . . I am a . . . virgin, and I have no immediate plans to change that status.
We both cringed, but then Charlies face smoothed out. He seemed to believe me.
Can I go to bed, now? Please.
In a minute, he said.
Aw, please, Dad? Im begging you.
The embarrassing parts over, I promise, he assured me.
I shot a glance at him, and was grateful to see that he looked more relaxed, that his face was back to its regular color. He sank down onto the sofa, sighing with relief that he was past the sex speech.
What now?
I just wanted to know how the balance thing is coming along.
Oh. Good, I guess. I made plans with Angela today. Im going to help her with her graduation announcements. Just us girls.
Thats nice. And what about Jake?
I sighed. I havent figured that one out yet, Dad.
Keep trying, Bella. I know youll do the right thing. Youre a good person.
Nice. So if I didnt figure out some way to make things right with Jacob, then I was a bad person? That was below the belt.
Sure, sure, I agreed. The automatic response almost made me smileit was something Id picked up from Jacob. I even said it in the same patronizing tone he used with his own father.
Charlie grinned and turned the sound back on. He slumped lower into the cushions, pleased with his nights work. I could tell he would be up with the game for a while.
Night, Bells.
See you in the morning! I sprinted for the stairs.
Edward was long gone and he wouldnt be back until Charlie was asleephe was probably out hunting or something to pass the timeso I was in no hurry to undress for bed. I wasnt in the mood to be alone, but I certainly wasnt going to go back downstairs to hang out with my Dad, just in case he thought of some topic of sex education that he hadnt touched on before; I shuddered.
So, thanks to Charlie, I was wound up and anxious. My homework was done and I didnt feel mellow enough for reading or just listening to music. I considered calling Renée with the news of my visit, but then I realized that it was three hours later in Florida, and she would be asleep.
I could call Angela, I supposed.
But suddenly I knew that it wasnt Angela that I wanted to talk to. That I needed to talk to.
I stared at the blank black window, biting my lip. I dont know how long I stood there weighing the pros against the consdoing the right thing by Jacob, seeing my closest friend again, being a good person, versus making Edward furious with me. Ten minutes maybe. Long enough to decide that the pros were valid while the cons were not. Edward was only concerned about my safety, and I knew that there was really no problem on that count.
The phone wasnt any help; Jacob had refused to answer my phone calls since Edwards return. Besides, I needed to see himsee him smiling again the way he used to. I needed to replace that awful last memory of his face warped and twisted by pain if I was ever going to have any peace of mind.
I had an hour probably. I could make a quick run down to La Push and be back before Edward realized I had gone. It was past my curfew, but would Charlie really care about that when Edward wasnt involved? One way to find out.
I grabbed my jacket and shoved my arms through the sleeves as I ran down the stairs.
Charlie looked up from the game, instantly suspicious.
You care if I go see Jake tonight? I asked breathlessly. I wont stay long.
As soon as I said Jakes name, Charlies expression relaxed into a smug smile. He didnt seem surprised at all that his lecture had taken effect so quickly. Sure, kid. No problem. Stay as long as you like.
Thanks, Dad, I said as I darted out the door.
Like any fugitive, I couldnt help looking over my shoulder a few times while I jogged to my truck, but the night was so black that there really was no point. I had to feel my way along the side of the truck to the handle.
My eyes were just beginning to adjust as I shoved my keys in the ignition. I twisted them hard to the left, but instead of roaring deafeningly to life, the engine just clicked. I tried it again with the same results.
And then a small motion in my peripheral vision made me jump.
Gah! I gasped in shock when I saw that I was not alone in the cab.
Edward sat very still, a faint bright spot in the darkness, only his hands moving as he turned a mysterious black object around and around. He stared at the object as he spoke.
Alice called, he murmured.
Alice! Damn. Id forgotten to account for her in my plans. He must have her watching me.
She got nervous when your future rather abruptly disappeared five minutes ago.
My eyes, already wide with surprise, popped wider.
Because she cant see the wolves, you know, he explained in the same low murmur. Had you forgotten that? When you decide to mingle your fate with theirs, you disappear, too. You couldnt know that part, I realize that. But can you understand why that might make me a little . . . anxious? Alice saw you disappear, and she couldnt even tell if youd come home or not. Your future got lost, just like theirs.
Were not sure why this is. Some natural defense theyre born with? He spoke as if he were talking to himself now, still looking at the piece of my trucks engine as he twirled it in his hands. That doesnt seem entirely likely, since I havent had any trouble reading their thoughts. The Blacks at least. Carlisle theorizes that its because their lives are so ruled by their transformations. Its more an involuntary reaction than a decision. Utterly unpredictable, and it changes everything about them. In that instant when they shift from one form to the other, they dont really even exist. The future cant hold them. . . .
I listened to his musing in stony silence.
Ill put your car back together in time for school, in case youd like to drive yourself, he assured me after a minute.
With my lips mashed together, I retrieved my keys and stiffly climbed out of the truck.
Shut your window if you want me to stay away tonight. Ill understand, he whispered just before I slammed the door.
I stomped into the house, slamming that door, too.
Whats wrong? Charlie demanded from the couch.
Truck wont start, I growled.
Want me to look at it?
No. Ill try it in the morning.
Want to use my car?
I wasnt supposed to drive his police cruiser. Charlie must be really desperate to get me to La Push. Nearly as desperate as I was.
No. Im tired, I grumbled. Night.
I stamped my way up the stairs, and went straight to my window. I shoved the metal frame roughlyit crashed shut and the glass trembled.
I stared at the shivering black glass for a long moment, until it was still. Then I sighed, and opened the window as wide as it would go.
3 MOTIVES
THE SUN WAS SO DEEPLY BURIED BEHIND THE CLOUDS that there was no way to tell if it had set or not. After the long flightchasing the sun westward so that it seemed unmoving in the skyit was especially disorienting; time seemed oddly variable. It took me by surprise when the forest gave way to the first buildings, signaling that we were nearly home.