He felt empty.
10Ronnie
For a while, a larger group had gathered at Bowers Point, but one by one, theyd taken off until only the five regulars remained. Some of the others had been okay, a couple were even kind of interesting, but then the liquor and beer started taking effect, and everyone but Ronnie thought they were a lot funnier than they really were. After a while, it got kind of boring and familiar.
She was standing alone at the waters edge. Behind her, near the bonfire, Teddy and Lance were smoking, drinking, and occasionally throwing fireballs at each other, Blaze was slurring her words and hanging all over Marcus. It was getting late, too. Not by New York standardsback home, she didnt show up at the clubs until midnightbut considering what time shed gotten up, it had been a long day. She was tired.
Tomorrow, she was going to sleep in. When she got home, she was going to hang towels or a blanket over the curtain rod; hell, shed nail them to the wall if she had to. She had no intention of spending the whole summer rising with the farmers, even if she was going to spend the day at the beach with Blaze. Blaze had surprised her with the suggestion, and it actually sounded kind of appealing. Besides, there wasnt much to do otherwise. Earlier, after theyd left the diner, theyd walked through most of the nearby shopsincluding the music store, which was very cooland afterward, theyd gone to Blazes house to watch The Breakfast Club while her mom was at work. Sure, it was an eighties movie, but Ronnie still loved it and had seen it at least a dozen times. Even though it was dated, it felt surprisingly real to her. More real than what was going on here tonightespecially since the more Blaze drank, the more she ignored Ronnie and clung to Marcus.
Ronnie already neither liked nor trusted Marcus. She had pretty good radar when it came to guys, and she sensed there was something off about him. It was like there was something missing in Marcuss eyes when he talked to her. He said the right thingsno more crazy suggestions about heading to Florida, at least, and by the way, how weird was that?but the more time she spent with him, the more he creeped her out. She didnt like Teddy or Lance, either, but Marcus she got the vibe that acting normal was simply a game he played so he could manipulate people.
And Blaze
It was strange being in her house earlier, because it seemed so normal. It stood in a quiet cul-de-sac and had bright blue shutters and an American flag that fluttered from the porch.
Inside, the walls were painted cheery colors, and a vase of fresh flowers stood on the dining room table. The place was clean, but not neurotically so. In the kitchen, there was some money on the table, along with a note addressed to Blaze. When Ronnie caught Blaze sliding a few bills into her pocket and reading the note, Blaze mentioned that her mom always left money for her. It was how she knew Blaze was okay when she didnt come home.
Odd.
What she really wanted was to talk to Blaze about Marcus, but she knew that wouldnt do any good. Lord knows shed learned that from KaylaKayla lived in denialbut even so, it didnt make sense. Marcus was bad news, and Blaze was clearly better off without him. She wondered why Blaze couldnt see that. Maybe tomorrow theyd talk about it at the beach.
Are we boring you?
Turning, she saw Marcus standing behind her. He was holding a fireball, letting it roll across the back of his hand.
I just wanted to come down to the water.
Do you want me to bring you a beer?
By the way he asked, she could tell he already knew what she was going to say.
I dont drink.
Why?
Because it makes people act stupid, she could have said. But she didnt. She knew that any explanation she offered would only prolong the conversation. I just dont. Thats all.
Just say no? he taunted.
If you say so.
In the darkness, he wore the ghost of a smile, but his eyes remained shadowy pits. Do you think youre better than us?
No.
Then cmon. He gestured to the bonfire. Sit with us.
Im fine.
He glanced over his shoulder. Behind him, Ronnie could see Blaze digging through the cooler for another beer, which was the last thing she needed. She was already unsteady on her feet.
Without warning, he took a step toward her, reaching for her waist. He squeezed, pulling her closer to him. Lets walk the beach.
No, she hissed. Im not in the mood. And take your hand off me.
It stayed in place. She could tell Marcus was enjoying this. You worried about what Blaze would think?
I just dont want to, okay?
Blaze wont care.
She took a step back, increasing the distance between them.
I do, she said. And Ive got to go.
He continued to stare at her. Yeah, you do that. Then, after a pause, he spoke up so the others could hear: No, Ill just stay here. But thanks for asking.
She was too shocked to say anything in response. Instead, she started down the beach, knowing that Blaze was watching, and suddenly thinking she couldnt get away fast enough.
At home, her father was playing the piano, and as soon as she walked in, he peeked at the clock.
After what just happened, she wasnt in the mood to deal with him, so she started for the hallway without a word. He must have seen something in her face, however, because he called out to her.
Are you okay?
She hesitated. Yeah, Im fine, she said.
You sure?
I dont want to talk about it.
He studied her before answering. Okay.
Is there anything else?
Its almost two a.m., he pointed out.
And?
He bent over the keyboard. Theres some pasta in the fridge if youre hungry.
She had to admit hed surprised her with that one. No lecture, no orders, no laying down the law. Pretty much the opposite of how Mom would have handled it. She shook her head and walked to the bedroom, wondering if anyone or anything was normal down here.
She forgot to hang blankets over the windows, and the sun lasered into the room, waking her after shed slept for less than six hours.
Groaning, she rolled over and pulled the pillow on top of her head when she remembered what had happened at the beach the night before. Then she sat up, knowing sleep was out of the question.
Marcus definitely creeped her out.
Her first thought was that she should have said something last night, when he had called out. Something like What the hell are you talking about? or If you think Id go anywhere alone with you, youre out of your mind! But she hadnt, and she suspected that simply walking away was the worst thing she could have done.
She really, really had to talk to Blaze.
With a sigh, she swung herself out of bed and padded to the bathroom. Quickly, she showered and threw on a bathing suit beneath her clothes, and then filled a tote bag with towels and lotion. By the time she was ready, she could hear her father playing the piano. Again. Even back in the apartment hed never played this much. Focusing on the music, she realized he was playing one of the pieces shed performed at Carnegie Hall, the same one on the CD that her mom had been playing in the car.
As if she didnt have enough to deal with right now.
She needed to find Blaze so she could explain what happened. Of course, how to do that without making Marcus out to be a liar might be a problem. Blaze would want to believe Marcus, and who knew what the guy had said after she left. But shed cross that bridge when she came to it; hopefully, lying in the sun would keep things mellow and she could bring it up naturally.
Ronnie left her bedroom and walked down the hall just as the music from the living room ended, only to be followed by the second piece shed played at Carnegie Hall.
She paused, adjusting the tote bag on her shoulder. Of course hed do that. No doubt because hed heard the shower and knew she was awake. No doubt because he wanted them to find common ground.
Well, not today, Dad. Sorry, but she had things to do. She really wasnt in the mood for this.
She was about to make a dash to the front door when Jonah emerged from the kitchen.
Didnt I say you were supposed to get something good for you? she heard her dad ask.
I did. Its a Pop-Tart.
I was thinking more along the lines of cereal.
This has sugar. Jonah wore an earnest expression. I need my energy, Dad.
She started to walk quickly through the living room, hoping to make it to the door before he tried to talk to her.
Jonah smiled. Oh, hey, Ronnie! he said.
Hi, Jonah. Bye, Jonah. She reached for the door handle.
Sweetheart? she heard her dad say. He stopped playing. Can we talk about last night?
I really dont have time to talk right now, she said, adjusting her tote bag.
I just want to know where you were all day.
Nowhere. Its not important.
It is important.
No, Dad, she said, her voice firm. It isnt. And Ive got things to do, okay?
Jonah motioned to the door with his Pop-Tart. What things? Where are you going now?
This was exactly the conversation shed hoped to avoid. Its none of your business.
How long are you going to be gone?
I dont know.
Will you be back for lunch or dinner?
I dont know, she huffed. Im leaving.
Her dad started to play the piano again. Her third piece from Carnegie Hall. He might as well have been playing Moms CD.
Were going to fly kites later. Me and Dad, I mean.
She didnt seem to hear him. Instead, she swiveled toward her dad. Would you just stop with that? she snapped.
He stopped playing abruptly. What?
The music youre playing! You dont think I recognize those pieces? I know what youre doing, and I already told you Im not going to play.
I believe you, he said.
Then why do you keep trying to get me to change my mind? Why is it that every time I see you, youre sitting there pounding away?
He seemed genuinely confused. It has nothing to do with you, he offered. It just
makes me feel better.
Well, it makes me feel sick. Dont you get that? I hate the piano. I hate that I had to play every single day! And I hate that I even have to see the damn thing anymore!
Before her dad could say another word, she turned, snatched Jonahs Pop-Tart out of his hand, and stormed out the door.
It took a couple of hours before she found Blaze in the same music store theyd visited yesterday, a couple of blocks from the pier. Ronnie hadnt known what to expect when theyd first visited the storeit seemed kind of antiquated these days in the age of iPods and downloadsbut Blaze had assured her it would be worth it, and it had been.
In addition to CDs, there were actual vinyl record albumsthousands of them, some of them most likely collectors items, including an unopened copy of Abbey Road and a slew of old 45s simply hanging on the wall with signatures of people like Elvis Presley, Bob Marley, and Ritchie Valens. Ronnie was amazed that they werent under lock and key. They had to be valuable, but the guy who managed the place looked like a throwback to the sixties and seemed to know everyone. He had long gray hair pulled back into a ponytail that reached his waist, and his glasses were the same kind John Lennon had favored. He wore sandals and a Hawaiian shirt, and though he was old enough to be Ronnies grandfather, he knew more about music than anyone shed ever met, including a lot of recent underground stuff shed never even heard in New York. Along the back wall were headphones where customers could either listen to albums and CDs or download music onto their iPods. Peeking through the window this morning, she saw Blaze standing with one hand cupping a headphone to an ear, the other tapping the table in rhythm to whatever she was listening to.
In no way was she prepared for a day at the beach.
Ronnie took a deep breath and headed inside. As bad as it soundedshe didnt think Blaze should be getting drunk in the first placeshe kind of hoped that Blaze had been so out of it that shed forgotten what happened. Or even better, that she had been sober enough to know that Ronnie had no interest in Marcus.
As soon as she started down the aisle full of CDs, Ronnie sensed that Blaze had been expecting her. She turned down the volume on the headphones, though she didnt remove them from her ears, and turned around. Ronnie could still hear the music, something loud and angry she didnt recognize. Blaze gathered up the CDs.
I thought we were friends, she started.
We are, Ronnie insisted. And Ive been looking all over for you because I didnt want you to have the wrong idea about what went on last night.
Blazes expression was icy. You mean about asking Marcus to go for a walk with you?
It wasnt like that, Ronnie pleaded. I didnt ask him. I dont know what his game was
His game? His game? Blaze threw down the headphones. I saw the way you were staring at him! I heard what you said!
But I didnt say it! I didnt ask him to walk anywhere
You tried to kiss him!
What are you talking about? I didnt try to kiss him
Blaze took a step forward. He told me!
Then hes lying! Ronnie snapped, holding her ground. Theres something seriously wrong with that guy.
No no dont even go there
He lied to you. I wouldnt kiss him. I dont even like him. The only reason I was there was because you insisted that we go.
For a long moment, Blaze didnt say anything. Ronnie wondered if she was finally getting through to her.