I push my hair off my face so I can see her better. Shes the second person today whos noticed something off about himabout us. First it was Haven with the whole telepathy thing, and now Sabines taking issue with his maturity and poise. And even though its easy enough to explain, the fact that theyre even noticing in the first place is what worries me.
And while I know theres only a few months between you, he somehow comes off asmore experienced. Too experienced. She shrugs. And Id hate for you to feel pressured into doing something youre not quite ready for.
I press my lips together and try not to laugh, thinking how she couldnt have gotten it more wrong. Assuming that Im the innocent maiden being chased by the big bad wolf, never imagining that Im actually the predator in this particular tale, dangerously pursuing my prey to the point of risking his life.
Because no matter what he may say, youre in control of you, Ever. Youre the one who determines who, where, and when. And no matter how you may feel about him, or any boy for that matter, they have no right to push their agenda on
Its not like that, I tell her, cutting in before this gets any more embarrassing than it already has. Damens not like that. Hes a perfect gentleman, an ideal boyfriend. Seriously, Sabine, youre way off course. Just trust me on this one, okay?
She looks at me for a moment, crisp orange aura wavering, wanting to believe, unsure if she should. Then she picks up her briefcase and heads for the door, stopping just shy of it when she says, I was thinking
I look at her, tempted to peek at her thoughts, despite my vow to never intentionally breach her privacy like thatunless its an emergency of course, which this clearly is not.
Since schools letting out soon, and since I havent heard you mention any summer plans, I thought it might be good for you to find a job, spend a few hours each day working at something. What do you think?
What do I think? I gape, eyes bugging, mouth dry, at a complete loss for words. Well, I think I shouldve peered into your head after all, because clearly this does qualify as a major distress call!
Nothing full time or anything like that. Therell be plenty of time for the beach and your friends. I just thought it would be good for you to
Is this about money? My mind reeling, desperate to find a way out. If its a simple matter of pitching in for the mortgage and groceries, then Ill gladly come up with whatever she needs. Heck, she can even take whatevers left of my parents life insurance policy for all I care. But what she cant have is my summer. Unh-uh. No way. Not even a day.
Ever, of course its not about money. She averts her gaze as her cheeks flush soft pink. Oddly averse to discussing all things financial for someone who makes a living as a corporate litigator. I just thought it might be good for you to, you know, meet some new people, learn something new. Get out of your usual environment for a few hours each day, and
And get away from Damen. Not needing to read her thoughts to know what this is really about. Now that she knows were back together shes more determined than ever to break us apart. And while I get how concerned she was by all the moodiness and depression I subjected her to when we were apart, this time shes got it all wrong. Its not like she thinks. Though Ive no idea how to explain that to her and still keep my secrets intact.
and as it so happens, a summer internship just opened up at the firm, and Im sure its just a matter of speaking with the senior partners and the job will be yours. She smiles, face radiant, eyes bright, expecting me to join the celebration as well.
But arent those positions usually reserved for law students? I ask, sure Im pathetically underqualified to fill those particular shoes.
But she just shakes her head. Its not that type of internship. This is more of a filing and phone answering assignment. And theres really no money in it either, though you will get school credit and a small end of the season bonus. I just thought it might do you some good. Not to mention how it will really beef up those college applications of yours.
College. Yet another thing I used to obsess about but not anymore. I mean, what possible use could I have for all of those classes and professors when all I have to do is place my hand on a book or peek inside my teachers head to know all the answers?
Id hate for anyone else to get in there when I know youre just perfect for the job.
I stare at her, unsure what to say.
Its good experience for a person your age, she adds, her indignant tone a result of my silence. Its recommended in all the books. They say it builds character, commitment, and the discipline to show up on time and get the job done.
Great. So I have Dr. Phil to thank for ruining my summer. Completely annoyed with Sabine until I remember how she was when I first got herecalm, relaxed, and completely laid back, allowing me all the space and freedom I needed. Its my fault she changed. My suspension, my refusal to ingest anything other than the red elixir, and all the drama with Damen is what sent her over the edge. And this is where it ledto the dreaded summer internship shes bent on securing for me.
But no way can I spend the summer juggling a mountain of files and incessantly ringing phones when Im going to need all the free time I can get to find an antidote for Damen. And working in Sabines office, with her and her colleagues snooping over my shoulder, just will not do.
Though its not like I can say that outright. Itll set off her alarms. I need to play it cool, let her know that while Ive nothing against discipline and character building, I prefer to tackle those things on my own.
Im totally cool with working, I say, trying not to press my lips together, fidget, or break eye contact, three definite giveaways that Im not being entirely honest. But since you do so much for me already, Id feel a lot better if I could find my own job. I mean, Im just not sure Im cut out for office work, so maybe I could look around a little. See what my options are. Ill even pitch in with the mortgage and food. Its the least I can do.
What food? She laughs, shaking her head. You barely eat! Besides, I dont want your money, Ever. Though I will help you establish a line of credit if youd like.
Sure. I shrug, forcing an enthusiasm I dont really feel since Ive absolutely no need for such conventional things. That would be great! I add, knowing that the longer I can keep her mind off this internship, the better for me.
Okay then. She drums her fingers against the doorjamb as she finalizes her plan. Youve got one week to find something on your own.
I gulp, trying to keep the eye bugging to a minimum. One week? What kind of a head start is that when I dont even know where to begin? Ive never had a job before. Is it possible to just manifest one?
I know its not much time, she says, reading my face. But Id hate for them to fill the position when I know youd be perfect.
She heads into the hall and closes the door between us, leaving me sideswiped, dumbstruck, staring at the flickering remnants of her orangey aura, her magnetic energy field, hovering insistently in the space where she stood. Thinking how ironic it is that I was just making fun of Damen for assuming he could land a job without any experience only to find myself facing the same exact fate.
CHAPTER 11
I toss and turn all night. Bed a tangled mess of sweat-dampened pillows and blankets, body and mind exhausted by dreams. Waking briefly, gasping for air, only to be pulled under again, returning to the very same place I fought to escape.
And the only reason I want it to stop is because Riley is there. Laughing happily as she grabs hold of my hand, taking me on a tour of a very strange land. But even though I skip right alongside her, pretending to enjoy the trip too, the moment she turns her back, I scramble for the surface, eager to remove myself from this scene.
Because the truth is, its not really Riley. Riley is gone. Having crossed the bridge at my urging, moving on to some unknown place. And even though she keeps yanking me back, yelling at me to pay attention, to just trust her and stop runningI refuse to obey. Sure that its some kind of punishment for harming Damen, sending Drina to the Shadowland, and putting everything I care about at riskallowing my subconscious to produce these guilt-induced images, so sugar-coated with happiness, theres no way theyre real.
But this last time, just as Im about to run, Riley appears right before me, blocking my exit, and yelling at me to stay put. Standing before a large stage and slowly drawing the drapes, revealing a tall, narrow, rectangular cubelike a prison of glasscontaining a desperate and struggling Damen inside.
I rush to his aid as Riley looks on, pleading with him to hang in there while I help him break free. But he cant even hear me. Cant even see me. Just continues to fight until so overcome with exhaustion, with the absolute futility, he closes his eyes and fades straight into the abyss.
The Shadowland.
The home for lost souls.
I bolt from my bed, body shaking, chilled, drenched with sweat, standing in the center of my room with a pillow clutched to my chest. Overcome not only by the feeling of utter defeat, but by the horrible message my imagined sister has senttelling me that no matter how hard I try, I cant save my soul mate from me.
I run for my closet, changing into some clothes before grabbing some sneakers and heading for the garage. Knowing its too early to go to school, too early to go anywhere. But I refuse to give up. Refuse to believe in nightmares. I have to start somewhere. Have to use what I got.
But just as Im about to climb into my car, I think better. Realizing the whole process of opening the garage door and starting the engine will risk waking Sabine. And even though I can easily step outside and manifest another car, bike, Vespa, or whatever else I might want, I decide to try running instead.
Ive never been much of a runner. Far more used to dragging my feet through every forced lap in P.E. than striving for any sort of personal best. But that was before I became immortal. Before I was gifted with incredible speed. A speed I havent even begun to test the limits of, since the last time I ran was the first time I realized I even had the potential. But now that Im faced with the perfect opportunity to see just how far and fast I can go before stopping, dropping, or crumbling to the ground with a debilitating case of side cramps, I cant wait to try it out.
I slip out the side door and head for the street. At first thinking I should warm up, start off in a nice slow jog before hitting the asphalt at full throttle. But no sooner have I started than a major surge of adrenaline kicks in, coursing through my body like the highest-grade rocket fuel. And the next thing I know, its full speed ahead. Running so fast my neighbors houses are reduced to a visual blur of stucco and stone. Jumping fallen trash cans and dodging poorly parked cars, as I race from street to street with the grace and agility of a jungle cat. Having virtually no awareness of my legs or my feet, just trusting they wont fail me. That theyll get me to my destination in miraculous time.
And no more than a few seconds have passed when Im standing before it, the one place I swore Id never return to, prepared to do the one thing I promised Damen I wouldntapproaching Romans door, hoping to broker some kind of deal.
But before I can even raise my hand to knock, Roman is there. Clad in a deep purple robe over blue silk pajamas, his matching velvet slippers with embroidered golden foxes peeking out from the hem. His gaze sleek, narrowed, looking me over without a trace of surprise.
Ever. He cocks his head to the side, allowing for an unobstructed view of his flashing Ouroboros tattoo. What brings you to the neighborhood?
My fingers play at the amulet just under my shirt, heart racing beneath it, hoping Damens right, that itll provide the necessary protectionshould it come to that.
We need to talk, I say, trying not to cringe as his eyes sail over me, enjoying a nice, long, leisurely cruise.
He squints into the night, then back at me. Do we? He lifts his brow. And here I had no idea.
I start to roll my eyes, but remembering my purpose for coming here, I settle for pressing my lips together instead.
Recognize the door? He raps his knuckles hard against the wood, eliciting a nice solid thump, as I wonder what he could possibly be up to. Of course you dont, he says, lips quirking at the sides. Thats because its new. I was forced to replace the old one after your last visit. You remember? When you busted your way in so you could toss my supply of elixir down the drain? He laughs and shakes his head. Very naughty of you, Ever. And quite a mess I must say. I hope youll manage to behave better today. He leans against the door frame and waves me in, gazing at me in a way so deep, so intimate, its all I can do not to squirm.
I head down the hall and into the den, noticing how the door isnt the only thing thats changed since I was last here. Gone are the framed Botticelli prints and abundance of chintz, all of it replaced by marble and stone, dark heavy fabrics, rough plastered walls, and black iron things shaped into scrolls.
Tuscan? I turn, startled to find him standing so near I can see the individual dark purple flecks in his eyes.
He shrugs, refusing to back up and give me some space. Sometimes I get a little hankering for the old country. He smiles, a slow widening of his cheeks, displaying shiny white teeth. As you well know, Ever, theres no place like home.
I swallow hard and turn away, trying to determine my quickest escape since I cant afford to make even the slightest mistake.
So tell me, to what do I owe this magnificent honor? He glances over his shoulder as he heads for the bar. Removing a bottle of elixir from the wine refrigerator and pouring it into a cut crystal glass, before offering it to me. But I just shake my head and wave it away, watching as he carries it over to the couch where he plops himself down, spreads his legs wide, and rests the glass on his knee. Im assuming you didnt drop by in the dead of night to admire my latest decorating scheme. So tell me, whats the purpose of this?