His hands curled into fists. She couldnt have cried. To do so, she would have had to care about him. She didnt care about him. Therefore, he couldnt allow himself to believe a single tear had fallen from her beautiful eyes.
So why did his chest still ache?
He forced his thoughts to clear and his gaze to move away from her face. A fluffy white towel was wrapped under her arms and hit just above her knees. Obviously she had removed her bra. He saw no telltale straps. Shed probably removed her panties, too. Theyd been so wet. So wonderfully wet.
The constriction in his chest migrated south. He knew what she looked like under all that cotton. Breasts that would fit in his hands. A soft though concave stomach. Hips that flared perfectly. Hed desperately wanted to grip her there and force her to rub against his erection, over and over again. Even now, she tempted him. Even? Hell, especially now.
Clothes are on the bed, he told her, turning away before he forgot the reasons hed left her alone in the shower. Even in his mind, his voice was rough. And yeah, it still shocked him every time he spoke to her without having to sign the words.
The connection between them was the very reason hed opted to tell her the truth about himself, about what he knew concerning her past. Hed decided to show most of his cards before she glimpsed them on her own, hoping shed then reveal her own cards.
He hated that his demon had gone silent the moment hed touched her and hadnt spoken up again. Secrets was always either quiet or agitated around her, and he never knew which hed get. What bothered him most was that the demon probably could have discovered everything about her. Except, though Amun could cast his voice into her head, he couldnt read her the same way he read everyone else. He wouldve liked to chastise Secrets for that, but didnt. He chastised himself. What was the use of having a demon if a man couldnt use the damn things abilities?
Wasnt like he could use the other demons, either. Theyd experienced the opposite reaction when he touched her, shrieking and scrambling for a new hiding place.
Behind him echoed a light patter of footsteps, then the rustle of clothing. He wanted to watch Haidee dress. He was desperate to see those curves again. All of her curves this time. Through the white cotton of her bra, every bit of fabric drenched, hed seen those firm breasts crested with rosy nipples perfect for sucking. And those matching panties
His spine went rigid as another hot blistering wave of need savaged him. Between her gorgeous legs, at the apex of her thighs, shed had a little tuft of hair slightly darker than the flaxen mass above. Hed almost dropped to his knees, almost dove in and feasted, shoving those unwanted panties out of the way and tasting the essence of her femininity. Gods, he remembered the sweetness of her. Knew the heaven that awaited him.
He needed to think about something else before he cut the tether of his control and fell on her and took her. He couldnt take her. As hed promised her, he would not allow himself to touch her again.
He blanked his mind. There was one thing guaranteed to piss him off and keep his hands to himself. Her tattoos. Just the thought had him biting his tongue until he tasted blood.
In the shower, hed gotten a peek at the travesty that was her back, and each marking had turned portions of his desire into boiling rage. If any part of him had ever doubted who she was, the tattoos there convinced him otherwise.
She kept score, Badens death proudly etched into her flesh. And the four Hunters the Lords had supposedly killed? He didnt know, but he would. How he would acquire the information when her secrets were her own, he didnt know, either. But again, he would.
Perhaps hed seduce the information out of her.
Seduce. Instantly, his mind and body returned to lusting after her. Seducing would involved touching.
Perhaps his no touching vow had been premature.
Really, why handicap himself? He should have her. Often. As many times as the urge struck him. Until he obtained the answers he craved. Until he worked her from his system. Until he realized that she hadnt called him baby while hed held and cleaned her because the endearment was clearly reserved for her precious Micah.
Red suddenly dotted Amuns vision, just as it had done in the shower when shed spoken the bastards name, and he drew in a deep breath. Holdhold. Slowly he pushed the oxygen through his nostrils.
Micah could very well be a descendant of his, as Haidee had said. The idea intrigued him. Hed never thought to have a blood-related family. However, the idea of that blood-related family being his enemy, well, that he didnt like. Wasnt like he and Micah could sit down and have a heart-to-heart, either. Besides the good versus evil thing, there was Haidee.
They both wanted her.
Amun should have taken her in the shower, despite her fragile protests, and pounded the worst of his emotions straight into her. And those protests of hers had been fragile. So fragile he could have bent his head and blown on the hammering pulse at the base of her neck and her reasons for denying him would have snapped beyond repair.
There were no doubts in his mind that shed hungered for him, too. Her pupils had been blown, her lips parted as shed struggled for air. She probably hadnt realized that her nails had sunk into his pecs the moment shed flattened her trembling palms on him, fingers curling, some part of her desperate to be connected to him, eradicating all hint of distance.
The action, small though it was, had been a claiming, and hed reacted violently. Not that hed shown her. That boiling rage had been his only link to sanity.
Over the years he had pampered the few women hed been with, and given them what time he could, as well as attention and fidelity. Even when they hadnt given him the sameand had then tried to hide their actions from him. As if they could. But he liked seeing a female light up because of his special treatment. He liked knowing he was the cause of their happiness.
He knew his friends considered him calm, without a temper. Normally he was. But when he looked at this woman, this supposed enemy, this unexpected savior, something hard and primal seethed inside him, knocking at the door of his restraint. He felt like a godsdamn caveman, wanting to carry off his woman and hide her from the rest of the world. Wanting to put his body between hers and anyone who dared threaten her. Wanting to tie her to his bed, keep her there forever, keep her ready for him.
Wanting to soothe her even as he ravaged her.
The desires were dark and sultry, insidious as they snuck past his defenses and wrapped around his every cell, changing the very fabric of his being. He was Amun no longer, but Haidees man.
That title was not something he could tolerate. Not for long, at least.
Still. He was on the right path, he decided. If he had her, he would tire of her. How could he not, when she was who she was? And when he tired of her, when the newness of her touch and taste and scent wore off and he no longer needed her to beat the demons back to maintain his good sense, he could do his duty and slay her. But until then
He would just have to continue protecting her.
The rustle of clothes died, and he pivoted on his heel, facing her. A smart man would never have given an enemy his back in the first place. But then, a smart Lord would never have allowed a Hunter to live long enough to dress.
Haidee stood by the side of the bed, arms hanging at her sides, her hands empty. His gaze raked her, and he told himself the perusal was necessary, that he needed to check for hidden weapons. The pink T-shirt and jeans she had donned belonged to Gwen, another petite female, but still they bagged on little Haidee. Despite her feminine curves, she was too thin.
Irritation joined his other emotions. Over the past however long Strider had been in charge of her care, the warrior had most likely given her enough food to survive. No more, no less. Shed probably lost pounds she hadnt been able to spare. That would change now that Amun was in charge. Causing needless suffering wasnt his style.
She had toweled off her hair as best she could, but still the blond-and-pink locks dripped onto her shirt, wetting the material covering the delicate frame of her shoulders.
What now? she asked in her raspy voice.
She hadnt shifted under his scrutiny, he realized. She had stood still, allowing him to look his fill. Perhaps shed studied him, too, because tiny flickers of the mating heat had returned to those distracting eyes.
He liked that she liked the look of him. Usually, with Paris and Strider and, hell, Sabin around him, women found the roughness of his features toowell, rough.
Sit down, he told her. Now we talk.
More talking? She didnt sound enthused.
Yes, more talking. He would not allow her to irritate him into forgetting what needed to be said, he vowed. Sit.
With only the barest hint of hesitation, she obeyed. She perched at the edge of the bed, folding her hands in her lap.
Thank you. Now, it was time to show her the rest of his cards. Her reaction would dictate their next course of action. Amun spread his legs, braced his knees and prepared to defend himself from attack.
What are we going to talk about?
Me. You guessed my identity, but I doubt you know exactly what that means. So here it is, flat out. Im possessed by the demon of Secrets. He waited for a reaction; he didnt get one. In the shower, hed merely played with the details, never actually admitting he was possessed.
And? she demanded.
No, he would not allow her to irritate him. And you know about immortals, but do you know anything about the heavens and hell?
I know they exist.
That was a start. Recently I ventured into hell to rescue a friend.
She gulped. You rescued another demon?
In a way. Legion had been demon, but had bargained with Lucifer for a human body. A human body she still possessed. She wasntisntevil. Well, not totallyand she was being tortured.
She?
Did he detect a note of jealousy or was that wishful thinking on his part? Yes. During the few days I spent down there, I wasovercome by demon thoughts and urges.
When he offered no more, she nodded.
Those thoughts and urges are a part of me now, driving me
Insane?
Now he was the one to nod, though his was stiff. Only when Im with you do those things become manageable.
Wariness fell over her lovely features like a curtain, but she didnt attack. Why me?
I have no idea.
Guess.
He released a sigh. Perhaps for the same reason I can project my voice into your head.
That tells me nothing, she said, pursing her lips.
How adorable she was, just then. A pouty princess. The thought made him frown. Whether we like it or not, there is something between us. Maybe, because of that, the demons know what I know, and theyre afraid of you. Afraid of Hunters.
Maybe. Soyou hate these thoughts and urges? Her question was soft, almost hopeful.
Why hopeful? Because she wanted to believe the best of him? Yes. Beyond anything.
She peered down at her lap, where her fingers were linked and now twisting together. He hadnt expected such calm. Not from her, a demon-hater, when hed just admitted to being poisoned by all kinds of evil.
Was she playing him? Lulling him into a false sense of relaxation? If so, what was her ultimate goal?
He should know; his demon should know. More than ever he hated that he couldnt read her. Hated that the two times hed peeked inside her mind, hed seen her smiling. Heard her laughing.
Hated, because the images were branded inside him, a part of him, haunting him. Hated that even so, he craved another glimpse.
Why did you tell me this? she asked.
Because of my affliction and your affiliation, we cant stay here. Im a danger to my friends, he told her, expecting her to argue. If she remained in one location, her associates had a better chance of finding her. And you, well, youre a danger to them, too. As much a danger as they are to you.
He didnt want either group to find her. Plus, his twenty-four hours were almost up, and every noise outside the door had him stiffening. Sabin was liable to burst into the room with a flamethrower at any moment.
Yes, we need to leave, she replied, thick lashes finally lifting. So where do you propose we go?
Such pragmatism was admirable. Combine that with the we and the heat of her gaze, and she presented a powerful aphrodisiac. You wish to stay with me?
Of course.
There was no of course about it. Why did she want to stay with him? His suspicious soul floundered for an answer, and found only one: she was playing him. Perhaps she even meant to lead him to her fellow Hunters, just as shed done to Baden.
Amuns hands curled into fists. Fists so tight and hard his already damaged knuckles cracked from the strain.
Amun? she prompted.
His name on her lipsanother aphrodisiac. We will go to the only place I can purge the thoughts and urges.
Her eyes widened. You can purge them? Once again she sounded hopeful, as if she truly cared.
Though the prospect rocked him to the core, he revealed only mild surprise. While you slept, I spoke with someone in the know. And the conversation had pissed him off royally.
You must return to hell, the angel Zacharel had said, unconcerned, when Amun sought him out.
What? Amun had mentally shouted. When he remembered to sign, his motions had been jerky. My little jaunt into hell is the reason Im like this. So returning isnt really a solution, is it?
You took the demons out, now you will take them back in.
No.
A shrug. Then you will forever be chained to the womans side. Not that forever will be long. Not for you. Without her, the spirits overcome you, and the next time you are overcome, you will die by my hand.
If getting rid of the demons is as easy as going to hell, why didnt you take me back already?