Raziel
The Fallen Book 1
By Kristina Douglas
RAZIEL IN THE BEGINNING
IAM RAZIEL, ONE OF THE TWENTY fallen angels spoken of by Enoch in the old books. I live in the hidden world of Sheol, with the other Fallen, where no one knows of our existence, and we have lived that way since the fall, millennia ago. I should have known there would be trouble on the horizon. I could feel it in my blood, and there is nothing more powerful than blood. I had taught myself to ignore those feelings, just as I had taught myself to ignore everything that conspired to betray me. Had I listened, things might have been different.
I rose that day, in the beginning, stretching out my wings to the feeble light of early morning. A storm was coming; I felt it throbbing in my veins, in my bones. For now the healing ocean was calm, the tide coming in, and the mist was thick and warm, an enveloping embrace, but the violence of nature hung heavy in the air.
Nature? Or Uriel?
I had slept outside again. Fallen asleep in one of the wooden chairs, nursing a Jack Daniels, one of the many pleasures of this last century or so. Too many Jacks, if truth be told. I hadnt wanted this morning to come, but then, I was not a fan of mornings. Just one more day in exile, with no hope of . . .what? Escape? Return? I could never return. I had seen too much, done too much.
I was bound here, as were the others. For years, so many years that theyd ceased to exist, lost in the mists of time, I had lived alone on this earth under a curse that would never be lifted.
Existence had been easier when Id had a mate. But Id lost too many over the years, and the pain, the love, were simply part of our curse. As long as I kept aloof, I could deprive Uriel of that one bit of torture. Celibacy was a small price to pay.
Id discovered that the longer I went without sex, the easier it was to endure, and occasional physical matings had sufficed. Until a few days ago, when the need for a female had suddenly come roaring back, first in my rebellious dreams, then in my waking hours. Nothing I did could dispel the feelinga hot, blistering need that couldnt be filled.
At least the women around me were all bonded. My hunger wasnt so strong that it crossed those linesI could look at the wives, both plain and beautiful, and feel nothing. I needed someone who existed in dreams only.
As long as she stayed there, I could concentrate on other things.
I folded my wings back around me and reached for my shirt. I had a job today, much as I hated it. It was my turn, and it was the only reason the détente existed. As long as we followed Uriels orders, there was an uneasy peace.
I and the other Fallen took turns ferrying souls to their destiny. Death-takers, Uriel called us.
And thats what we were. Death-takers, blood-eaters, fallen angels doomed to eternal life.
I moved toward the great house slowly as the sun rose over the mountains. I put my hand on the cast-iron doorknob, then paused, turning to look back at the ocean, the roiling salt sea that called to me as surely as the mysterious siren female who haunted my dreams.
It was time for someone to die.
I AM URIEL THE MOST high, the archangel who never fell, who never failed, who serves the Lord in his awful majesty, smiting sinners, turning wicked cities to rubble and curious women to pillars of salt. I am his most trusted servant, his emissary, his voice in the wilderness, his hand on the sword. If need be, I will consume this wicked, wicked world with fire and start anew. Fire to scourge everything, then flood to follow and replenish the land.
I am not God. I am merely his appointed one, to assure his judgment is carried out. And I am waiting.
The Highest One is infallible, or I would judge the Fallen to be a most grievous mistake and smite them from existence. They have been damned to eternal torment, and yet they do not suffer. It is the will of the Most Holy that they live out their endless existence, forced to survive by despicable means, and yet they know joy. Somehow, despite the black curses laid upon them, they know joy.
But sooner or later, they will go too far. They will join the First, the Bringer of Light, the Rebel, in the boundless depths of the earth, locked in silence and solitude throughout the end of time.
I am Uriel. Repent and beware.
CHAPTER ONE
IWAS RUNNING LATE, WHICH WAS NO surprise. I always seemed to be in a rushthere was a meeting with my editors halfway across Manhattan, I had a deposit to make before the end of the business day, my shoes were killing me, and I was so hungry I could have eaten the glass and metal desk Id been allotted at my temp job at the Pitt Foundation.
I could handle most of those thingsI was nothing if not adaptable. People were used to my tendency to show up late; the secretary over at MacSimmons Publishers was wise enough to schedule my appointments and then tell me they were half an hour earlier. It was a little game we playedunfortunately, since I now knew the rules, Id arrive an hour late, ruining her careful arrangements.