It was a further drop than I had anticipated; I hit the muddied, wet ground with a loud grunt. Pain shot through my bruised tailbone and elbow. For a moment the air was knocked forcefully out of me, and then it gasped wonderfully, blessedly back in. I panted, clawing at the watery ground as I pulled myself clear of the pipe exit. I blinked against the bright light of day that burned my eyes.
Though it was wet beneath me I was not in a puddle, and even if I couldnt see yet I knew that I was in the wide open. I could feel that there were no walls around me anymore; feel my freedom even though I could not clearly see it yet. Hands seized hold of my arms; I blinked, trying to clear the tears away that were blurring my vision. It was then that I realized that the sun was not the reason I couldnt see, it was the tears streaking down my face and clogging my eyes. Are you ok? Cade demanded.
I wanted to nod, wanted to speak, wanted to reassure him that I was dazed, but completely fine. Instead a terrified, brutal scream ripped from my throat. I couldnt stop it, and once it tore free, I could feel unending shrieks of anguish and terror building up and roiling through me. I was shaken, torn, and very close to coming completely undone. I had managed to keep it together in that awful pipe, but it had
been too much, and I was completely unraveling. I could feel a shattering forming inside of me, a soul wrenching breaking that I was very afraid might just destroy me.
Cade wrapped me up in his arms, pulling me tight against him. He buried my head in his neck, muffling the sounds of my shrieks with his body. I clung to him, continuing to scream as all of the pent up frustration, terror, and horror of that pipe, and everything else that had occurred, boiled out of me. And once it started I couldnt stop it, could no longer contain it.
Bethany, Bethy baby hush. Youre out now, you made it. Youre free, its over, and you did great. You did great, Cade whispered against my ear, his hands entangling in my snarled and filthy hair as he pressed me closer.
I shuddered, clawing at his skin and clothes, trying harder to get closer to him, though it was nearly impossible to do so. It was impossible to be any closer, but I needed to be, I needed more. I needed him, all of him. The absolute certainty of that was soul shaking, it nearly ripped me in two as I held him, oblivious to anyone outside of the two of us. No one else existed in this world of warm security within Cades strong embrace. I wasnt aware that my screams had subsided until I felt the gentle caress of his hands over my hair, soothing me gently, and whispering softly to me as I began to tremble. Not from fear this time, or relief, but from the sheer wonder of this tender moment, and his touch.
I did not even care that we were both covered with slime, and stunk to high heaven. I didnt even care that there were two other people watching us. All I cared about was the fact that I didnt ever want to let go. I could hear his answering response to me in the excited beat of his heart, and the slight tremble that gripped his body.
Bethany, he whispered, his lips against my ear, his hands in my ear. My brave Bethany.
I didnt feel so brave today. I felt like a coward, and childlike. I felt drained, and nearly defeated. If it hadnt been for his quiet strength, and unwavering faith in me, I wasnt sure that I would have made it this far. It was a faith I wasnt sure I deserved, especially not after the breakdown I had just experienced. Jenna may complain about everything, but at least she was keeping it together. I was unraveling faster than a yo-yo. If there had been any aliens in the area, I could have just killed us and all because I had a problem with small spaces.
Im sorry, I breathed.
He didnt tell me it was ok, didnt say anything but simply brushed a gentle kiss over my temple. He may have forced Jenna into the pipe, he may have even left her behind, but in that moment I knew that he wouldnt have forced me, and he wouldnt have left me. He would have done everything he could to keep me safe for as long as possible, even if it meant dying himself. I wanted to start crying again at the realization, but this time I managed to keep my tears at bay. What was this wonderful, horrible, confusing situation that I had been sucked into?
Just days ago life hadnt been perfect, but it had been peaceful. Id had a home, and a mom. Id known my siblings were safe, and that I would be seeing them again. Id had a nice, loving boyfriend. I had been certain that if enough time passed I would come to love him one day, because who wouldnt love Bret? Every other girl in the school loved him, except for me.
But wrapped tight in Cades arms I began to understand why I had never been in love with Bret. Even though I hadnt known it, and might never have recognized it if it hadnt been for everything that had happened, I understood it now. Ever since those long ago days of fishing, playing, kind words, and small smiles; ever since that long ago night in the garden, Cade had owned my heart, and always would.