But J. Weltus takes pity on you, and soon has yer boots in hand; and, as the swell says, he analyses
em. And then where are yer? Heres your sole good for nought the welt gone, heel sunk, and a whole regiment of pegs sticking up inside fit to rasp every bit o skin off yer foot.
Well, of course he grins; but you wants em to-morrow? Werry good; and he grins again to find that with all yer machine-making and sewing, yer obliged to come back to the old mender after all; so he takes off his glasses, gets Kidney Joe to cast a hye on his stall, and runs round to the grindery shop in Drury Lane, and comes back in ten minutes with a few real Archangel bristles, a ball of hemp, a set of first-class leather, some stuffin; and of course, just as if to insult him, the counters chock full o ready-closed uppers, with all sorts o jigamaree, fiddle-faddle stitching about em, as aint no good only to let the water in. Then off he sets again only he has to go back for his wax, which is, as one may say, the mainspring of a boot the mortar of the edifice, as holds all together and as it should be.
Nex day you comes for the boots, and there they are. Well, they aint done; but J.W.s a-ripping into em. Ones been touched over with a bit o glass, as has smoothed the new half-sole wonderful, and anothers being sprigged; then the edgesll be waxed up a bit with the dubbin, and then theres yer boots a tighter and a better pair than they was afore, and all for three shillings, or three-and-six, according to your customer.
I never puts any toe-pieces on, punched full o holes to make em look ansum; but does my work in the good old style, and if I was in Parliament every man as didnt wear Wellingtons should be taxed.
But along o them cards in the winders. Well, a chap come to me one day, and wanted me to be agent, and I stares up at him at first to see as he wasnt joking, Loans of from 5 pounds to 100 pounds upon personal security, says the card he showed me, just as you can see em in hundreds o back courts and slums places where you may be sure people wants heaps o money.
Do a wonderful stroke o business, I says, looking at my chap. Find plenty o customers down here; but praps they might object to the smell o the leather, and so keep away.
Bless yer, no, says the chap not at all. Many of our agents is marine-store dealers and groshers. Good commission for you if you like to take it.
But I wouldnt; and there hung the card in the little red herring and sweet shop till last week, when they had to turn out because the place is all coming down to make way for the new law courts, and setrer.
Do! of course its a do; same as those wertisements in the papers is from distressed tradesmen wholl give five pound for the loan of ten for a week, and deposit fifty pounds wally of stuff for security pawn tickets, yer know cards got from folks uncle when theyve been on a wisit Frock-coat and satin wesket, fifteen and nine, John Smith, 999, Snooks-street and all on to that tune. Traps traps traps, every one on em, as the poor fellows know as has had any dealings with the moneylenders.
Now, just look here; about the only honest one there is, is your uncle. Fixed interest, certain time, and he wants security. Saturday night and a hard week, and rent due, and the chap as the boots was made for not come to fetch em; the pair as was mended not paid for and all the stuff required cost money, you see so off you goes to your uncle with two flat irons and the missuss ring. Then you does your bit of negotiation, and the jobs done; and out you come from the little court where the door flaps to, and alls right and square, and no odds to nobody; but just try same as Jinks did to get a loan from the Cosmypolitan and Jint-Stock Adwance and Discount Company, and see how you like it. So many stamps for application; so much for inquiry fee; so much for this, and so much for that, and so on.
Jinks comes in, as maybe you, and he says, I shall be wantin a pair o boots nex week, he says, and you may as well take the measure now, he says; save time when I gives the order.
All right, I says, getting hold o my rule and a strip o paper.
But I dunno yet what sort Ill have, he says. Ive a sorter leaning towards lasticks; but I dunno, he says, but what Id best stick to the old sort laceups.
Say the word, I says, and he said it Lasticks! and I took his measure, and brought out a pen, dips in my ink-bottle, and makes marks; and all the time he was precious busy rattling some printed paper about and pretending to be reading.
Oh, Weltus, he says all at once, just as if it struck him all at the moment, Im a-going to have an advance from the ciety.
Are you? I says inches and a harf lasticks kid tops.
What? he says.
Only my measuring, I says, with the pen in my mouth.
Oh! he says, jusso. And then
he goes on Bliged to get a couple of tradesmen spectable tradesmen to sign their names to the papers just to show, you know, as Im some one decent. Youll be one, wont yer?
One what? I says bondsman?