Youve really never been on a camp out? Didnt you ever sleep in the backyard with friends or go to Girl Scout camp?
She heard the incredulity in his voice. No outdoor sleepovers,
no Girl Scouts. The closest Ive ever come to camping out was when my sister and I made a tent in our bedroom and pretended we were wilderness guides.
The memory brought with it a glow of happiness as she remembered that night. She and Alicia had fashioned a tent from the top of their dresser to the top of their bed. Theyd spent hours making shadow animals on the ceiling with the aid of a flashlight.
Theyd eaten an entire package of cookies while making up scary stories to entertain each other. Their mother had grounded them the next morning when shed seen the mess they had made, but the nights adventure had been worth the punishment.
The warmth of the memory battled with the coldness of loss, creating a whirlwind of grief to whip through her.
Cecilia? Jesse pulled her from the memory.
We can tell everyone we met camping, she said, suddenly changing her mind. We can tell them I was camping with my sister and you were at the site next to ours. I dont think anyone will really ask me about the actual camping experience, do you?
I sincerely doubt it. She heard the crunch as he ate a potato chip, then he continued. And well tell everyone that since that time weve been burning up the phone lines.
She nodded. Then its official. You now have a girlfriend. She finished the last bite of her hamburger, then gazed across to where she knew he sat. Will people think it odd that you fell in love with a blind woman?
People will find it odd that Im in love with anyone.
Again she heard a smile in his voice. Why is that? she asked curiously.
Ive been the elusive bachelor of Mustang for a long time now. Mothers try to set me up with their daughters, aunts corner me in stores and tell me about the charms of their nieces.
You must be very good-looking, she observed.
The smile shed heard in his voice turned into full-blown laughter. He had a wonderful laugh. Deep and resonant, it brought with it a wealth of warmth that fluttered inside her, momentarily banishing the frozen tears that had encased her heart.
No, not particularly good-looking, he replied. Just one of the few young, available bachelors in town. Besides, you know what they say about women and men in uniform.
Men in uniform. Suddenly her body went cold. John and Alicia had worn the blue uniforms of the Templeton Police Department.
They had loved working law enforcement in the small Chicago suburb. Uniforms with badges. Symbols of safety. And yet the thought of those badges and dark blue outfits evoked dreadful disquiet. Forcefully she shoved away thoughts of her last family.
Instead she focused on the man across from her, the man she could smell, could sense, but couldnt see. How old are you? she asked.
Didnt your mother ever tell you it wasnt polite to ask somebody their age? There was a soft, teasing lilt to his tone.
My mother taught me that if you want to know something, ask.
Smart woman, your mother. Im almost thirty.
Why havent you married and started a family? I thought people in small towns married young.
Relationships have always seemed too complicated and difficult to maintain. I love my job, I like my home. Thats always been enough for me.
She smiled. No wonder youre considered a catch. Theres nothing like the challenge of a confirmed bachelor to whet the appetite of single women.
Speaking of appetites, would you like another hamburger?
No, thanks. Im fine. She heard his chair scoot back and knew hed gotten up from the table. Im sorry I cant help with the cleanup. Dishes that feel clean dont always look clean.
Dont worry about it.
Its not real. The words fell from her mouth without any warning.
Excuse me?
My blindness. Its not real.
There was a long moment of silence. What do you mean? Are you faking your blindness? She heard the bewilderment in his voice.
No, the blindness is real, but theres no physical reason for it. Its psychosomatic. Hysterical blindness is what the doctors call it. She couldnt help the anger that sharpened her tone.
She was sorry shed brought it up. The whole thing made her feel weak, stupid and crazy. And now he would think she was weak, stupid and crazy.
This happened at the same time as whatever happened that put you in protective custody? he asked softly.
She nodded. Ive been blind for a month. The doctors say my sight could return at any time. Theyd also said it was possible it might never return, but she refused to consider that possibility.
He remained silent and she continued. I just thought you should know. I havent had time to adjust much, so Im not
what youd consider a high-functioning blind person. She couldnt help the bitterness, the slight ache of the unfairness of it all that colored her voice. But we wont tell your friends that not only did you have the misfortune of falling in love with a blind woman, but a crazy one, as well.
There was another long pause. Self-pity isnt very becoming.