Cath? Shit.
Cath sat up slowly. Nothing seemed broken.
Why were you standing right in front of the door? Reagan demanded.
Maybe I was on my way out, Cath said. Jesus. Why do you have to kick the door open every single time you come home?
My hands are always full. Reagan set down her backpack and her duffel bag and offered Cath a hand. Cath ignored it and pulled herself up using the bed. If you know I always kick the door open, Reagan said, you should know not to stand there.
I thought you were at the party. Cath put her glasses back on. Is this how you say youre sorry?
Sorry, Reagan said. Like it cost her all her tips. I had to work. Im going to the party now.
Oh.
Reagan kicked one of her shoes into her closet. Are you coming with?
She didnt look at Cath. If she had, Cath might have said something other than what she didSure.
Reagan stopped mid-kick and looked up. Oh? Okay Well. Im just going to change.
Okay, Cath said.
All right Reagan grabbed her toothbrush and makeup bag and glanced back at Cath, smiling in approval.
Cath looked at the ceiling. Just change.
As soon as Reagan left, Cath jumped up, wincing and feeling her side again, and opened her closet. Baz glared at her from the back side of her closet door.
Dont just stand there, she mumbled to the cutout. Help me.
When she and Wren divided up their clothes, Wren had taken anything that said party at a boys place or leaving the house. Cath had taken everything that said up all night writing or its okay to spill tea on this. Shed accidentally grabbed a pair of Wrens jeans at Thanksgiving, so she put those on. She found a white T-shirt that didnt have anything on itanything Simon anyway; there was a weird stain shed have to hide with a sweater. She dug out her least pilled-up black cardigan.
Cath had makeup somewhere in one of her drawers. She found mascara, an eyeliner pencil, and a crusty-looking bottle of foundation, then went to stand in front of Reagans makeup mirror.
When Reagan came back, gently opening the door, her face looked fresh, and her red hair was flat and smooth. Reagan looked kind of like Adele, Cath thought. If Adele had a harder, somewhat sharper twin sister. (Doppelgänger.)
Look at you, Reagan said. You look slightly nicer than usual.
Cath groaned, feeling too helpless to snark back.
Reagan laughed. You look fine. Your hair looks good. Its like Kristen Stewarts when shes got extensions. Shake it out.
Cath shook her head like she was emphatically disagreeing with something.
Reagan sighed and took Caths shoulders, pulling her head down and shaking her hair out at the roots. Caths glasses fell off.
If youre not going to blow it out, Reagan said, you may as well look like youve just been fucked.
Jesus, Cath said, pulling her head back. Dont be gross. She bent over to pick up her glasses.
Do you need those? Reagan asked.
YesCath put them onI need them to keep me from becoming the girl in Shes All That .
It doesnt matter, Reagan said. He already likes you. I think hes into the nerdy schoolgirl thing. He talks about you like youre something he found in a natural history museum.
This confirmed everything Cath had ever feared about Levi wanting to buy a ticket to her freak show. Thats not a good thing, she said.
It is if its Levi, Reagan said. He loves that stuff. When he gets really sad, he likes to walk around Morrill Hall.
That was the museum on campus. There were wildlife dioramas and the worlds largest mammoth fossil. He does? God that s cute.
Reagan rolled her eyes. Come on.
* * *
It was almost eleven when they got to Levis housebut not exactly dark, because of all the snow. Will anybody still be here? Cath asked Reagan when they got out of the car.
Levi will still be here. He lives here.
The house was exactly as Cath had imagined it. It was in an old neighborhood with big white Victorian houses. Every house had a huge porch and way too many mailboxes next to the door. Parking was ridiculous. They had to park four blocks away, and Cath was glad she wasnt wearing pointy, high-heeled boots like Reagans.
By the time they got to the door, Caths stomach had realized what was happening. It twisted painfully, and she could feel her breath coming and going too soon.
She couldnt believe she was doing this. Boy. Party. Strangers. Beer. Strangers. Party. Boy. Eye contact.
Reagan glanced over at her. Dont be a spaz, she said sternly.
Cath nodded, looking down at the worn-smooth welcome mat.
Im not going to abandon you in there, Reagan said, even if I want to.
Cath nodded again, and Reagan opened the door.
It was immediately warmer and brighter insideand exactly not how Cath had imagined it.
Cath had pictured bare walls and the sort of furniture that sat out on curbs for a week before anybody decided to take it.
But Levis house was actually nice. Simple, but nice. There were a few paintings hanging on the walls, and houseplants everywhereferns and spider plants and a jade tree so big, it looked like an actual tree.